Sunday, December 5, 2010

Not Sure Who To Be Mad At - Tia


I have so much that I want to write about but simply don't have the time at the moment. So I'll start with this topic and hopefully add the rest in the coming days. 

Unless you've been under a rock, you have to admit that the last few weeks haven't been the best for black females. Coming off the major success of Black Girls Rock, I have seen/heard/been subjected to no less than 3 incidents that have made me sad as a black woman. From Nicki Minaj getting groped by Regis to Keri Hilson doing the most hoe sh!t that I've seen in a long time, black woman empowerment has not had a stellar few weeks. I plan to address Keri's situation in another post. (But know I don't like Pretty Girl Rock and The Way You Love Me gets two thumbs down and a Bible thrown at it.) But this post is dedicate to Ms. Minaj getting her booty groped by an old white man. 

In case you're not familiar, this is how it went down: After performing her current single, "Right Through Me", Nicki was being interview by Regis and Kelly per usual. Regis made a comment about Nicki's outfit and then playfully, and seemingly innocently, tapped her on the butt. Both Regis and Nicki seemed to laugh the incident off and continued with the interview. Later on her Twitter account Minaj laughed the whole thing off simply saying, "LOL. I was in shock." You can see the whole thing here at around the 3:45 mark.

Here's my problem,  I'm not sure who I should be more mad at: Regis or Nicki. Regis is entirely too old to behave like this. And call me sensitive, but his actions conjure up actions of the past when blacks were just property and could be treated in any manner their owners saw fit. It's no secret that black women have for years been  hyper-sexualized and viewed as objects rather than people. So when this behavior is perpetuated on a national scale by a 79-year-old white man it's no wonder that the erroneous attitudes persist in our culture. Additionally, I have a hard time believing that if an artist like Taylor Swift, Ke$ha, or Beyonce had been in Nicki's place that Regis would have taken such liberties. 

As far as Nicki goes, I'm irritated with her because she let the incident pass without so much as a passing side eye of disapproval. We all know that Nicki is by no means the bastion of ladylike behavior. I'm not hating on the girl but by her own admission she is the current head chick for female empowerment. (read: A$$ slanging and hoe sh!t) However, if you want to be the head chick in charge then shouldn't you demand respect? When a man who is two steps from a complete stranger takes it upon himself to feel on your goodies, shouldn't you love yourself enough to correct said stranger and put him in his place? Now hear me, I'm not saying Nicki should have snapped on national television and gone all "ignint black girl" on Regis (we already have a hard enough time dispelling that stereotype.) But there is a way to correct people that not only puts them in their place but let's them know that you demand your respect. And it does not involve any eye or neck rolling. Nicki could have very easily said something that may have sounded jovial but would have been understood as, "That is NOT okay." Regis would have been humbled to the point that an apology would have been forthcoming. However, her inaction basically told millions of people that, "Yes, it is okay to treat black women like sexual objects. Just smile and carry on."

I could very easily go on for days about how certain black women in the music industry set back black women around the world but I won't. My anger at this moment is at a point that I can't say anything constructive. I'm angry at everyone: The executives who push the ridiculousness down our throats, the women in the industry who do hoe sh!t and set back our race and gender, the men in the industry who co-sign and help perpetuate the negative stereotypes, the parents who don't raise their get the picture. 

Anyway, we'd love to hear your thoughts on the matter. So feel free to get on your soapbox in the comments section and let us know what you think. If you think I'm being too sensitive feel free to share. If you think I'm right, you're right, I am....I'm kidding...Mostly. But we welcome your opinion, comments, feedback....good, bad or indifferent.    



Tori Weston said...

First, I can see why you may be upset but at the same time this is the catch 22 all women are in. Granted, Regis tip-toed a little over the line but it happened too quickly to even react. Who knows what might have been said backstage, etc. Also, we as black women have not been able to fully express our sexuality. This brings me to Keri Hilson-I saw her response on perez hilton and yes, there are times when as a woman you just want to be 'fucked.' Why can't we express that?

As Dan Savage, the sex columnist, says women's sexuality is fluid. It comes in all forms and in an ideal society we should be able to express that. We should be able to be smart, sexy, explicit, etc. Yes, we do not live in an ideal society but that shouldn't stop us from fully expressing ourselves. If we as black women want to show that there is a wide range of us we have to be open to that range. My only problem is , is when this range is being 'forced' to be provocative and not for the sake of this is 'how I feel, is who I am.' I have always gravitated towards the artist that take risks and well since Nicki Minaj is coming from one of the most prestigious arts high schools in the country I am confident that there is a method to her madness. Why is it that we are so willing to accept our male artist to fully express their sexuality yet we criticize when females do?

Niki said...

I think the problem comes in when there is not enough balance out there of images of black women. Can't we be more than the booty-poppin'chick talking about how tight her head game is, the loud and abrasive emasculator or or the repressed, genderless, super-achieving "black sidekick"?

I agree with you, Tia, that the extra hoe shizzle in music is getting out of hand, though. I feel sad for young girls, as this models behavior and gives them the idea that this is what being a grown , liberated woman is about. Yes, sometimes we do just want somebody to "put it on ya", but that's not the beginning and end of the story either.

Lei said...

I was just looking at the pics posted, the one of Rhianna basically wearing underwear on stage and Faith Evans covered up and still looking sexy. Hmmm? Wonder who the young girls will look up to. I also find it funny that Rhianna won't pose for Playboy but comes pretty close in a lot of the pics she takes.

Anonymous said...

i dont think i would have thought much about it ,,if it werent for Kelly's reaction...which was more revealing than the actual act. It was so big that it was as if she knew what it meant and that he was going too far. Watching it just looked like he snapped her hem line..if you can call it that..either way i think her little flirt gave him the confidence..and the joke about lil wayne seemed inappropriate BUT it seemed rehearsed at the same time...a set up for him to make a joke.