Sunday, January 17, 2010

Updates on stuff and things - Tia
(We are aware that the comments are down. We are working on that and on a new format. We hope to have everything moved by March. Sorry for the inconvenience.)

I find that I get really distracted these days by what's going on in the moment. Toya once said that I'm easily tracked as in one-track mind. I think it was a nice way of saying that I'm a bit absent-minded. But it's true. I sometimes tend to focus on what's happening in the moment and forget about other things that are going on. That said, I have been hopelessly slack on posting. I will attempt to do better in the coming days. So here goes...

- I got a job. I got a great job. I work for DUKE!!! Anyone who knows anything about me knows that I have been a fan of Duke basketball since I was about 11. So this job is so perfect. I still don't know if I can get tickets to the games (I hear you have to practically knock down someone's grandmother to get seats) but it's a job nonetheless. It is a contract position. The contract is a couple of years long. So it's a good fit for the moment.

I sat down and did my budget and things will be looking up pretty soon here. And since I spent the last few months living like a vagabond, I now know what I can and can't live off of. So if I play my cards right and if my math is correct I should be out of credit card debt and have my car paid off by the time my lease is up. So PRAISE GOD!!!! for everything that has happened in the last few months.

- NYC....Yeah....I was ill prepared for the animal that is NYC. The cold was a shock to my system. I walked outside one day and just didn't know what to do because of the cold. I literally just stood there for a moment and cursed the air because it was so cold. I also was not prepared for how much of a hassle it is to get small things done in a city where everything is supposed to be convenient. By that I mean, I'm so accustomed to being within 5 miles of 4 Krogers, 2 Walmarts, several banks, a car wash and every gas station known to man. I was not prepared to have to work to find a gas station and lactose free milk and I have given up on getting my car washed with any sort of regular frequency. (That last part is a shame because the birds do not seem to care how cold it is and camp out in the trees on my block if for no other reason than so that they crap on all of the cars on the street.) It's still a shock to my system and my wallet to have to pay $7 for lactose free milk. I can understand housing being more expensive but the cost of food makes no sense to me. There's no justification. It's not like the milk has to travel farther to get here. It's insulting. But I's NEEEEEW I mean...I guess.

- Home has taken on new meaning for me. I got to go to Nashville for New Years. It was the first time that I'd been there since the summer. Thanks to a couple of parties I got to see a lot of my friends and I realized that I really missed those people. I have spent the last 6 years in an industry that does not allow for a lot of time to build relationships. (Please reference Up In the Air. That's basically been my life for the last few years.) And as I've gotten older I've gotten crotchety and don't really want to take the time to meet a lot of new people. But then I fight loneliness on an almost daily basis, so go figure. The thing is, I like the friends that I have. And while I'm not completely averse to meeting new people, it's nice to meet people that come with a referral, if you will.

Anyway, after being there I realized that Nashville really is home for me. I spent every summer of my childhood there with my father and then I lived there up until the adventures of the last few years happened. And for all it's faults and 1 degree of separation and boys in skinny jeans it's home. And if I'm being honest, I want to go home.

- New Years was...eye opening. After making out with a friend of a friend of mine on New Years (yes...that happened. And don't ask who it was. Nashville is small and we have a lot of readers there and I would prefer to not have someone walk up to dude in Crema and ask him about the incident) I realized that I really want a serious relationship and I really want to be married. Random hook-ups with random guys are nice for about 3 minutes and then it's old. So many of my friends are married, having babies, buying homes and I feel like I've missed a step some how. Not that marriage and kids makes you an adult. But there's something about sharing your life with another person that I really want to do.

I was watching Away We Go the other night (great movie by the way) and there is a scene when Maya Rudolph asks, "Are we f*ckups?" referring to she and her boyfriend's station in life. I completely understood where she was coming from with that. For all intents and purposes, I feel like I have nothing to show for my life of adulthood that I have been in for some time now. And while I'm not saying that a relationship would validate my "adultness" I think it would on some level cushion the blow of the haphazard life I seem to live.....I don't know...I just think it would be nice to do life with someone.....

That's all I've got for now. I'll holla.

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