Saturday, December 26, 2009

Party Life It's My Birthday!!!!!- Toya

Hello 35! *WHEW* 34 was a rough one but praise God! I made it through,yall. I am so serious when I say that I have never been more excited about a birthday in my entire life. I am REALLY grown, for one. And two, I truly believe that God is about to open some doors to great things in my life. I look forward to sharing more adventures with you all. In the meantime, Bebe and Cece's "Celebrate New Life" has been in my head since last night. I pay attention to all songs that randomly pop into my head so I was happy to start jamming to this one this morning. You don't have to wait until New Year's. Leave all that past junk behind and start celebrating now!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

"Oh my God, an ill reindeer!!!!"

Hello everyone!!!!! I (Toya) am so excited about Christmas and my 35th birthday this weekend. I feel like my new year is about to start. Also, I will be home with my family whom I miss so much.

This has been a great year for this blog as so many of you have reached out to us and let us know that you are out there. Thanks for sticking with us, encouraging us, and giving us your input. We sincerely appreciate all of you so much. Have a wonderful holiday and expect great things in 2010. 2009 has been rough but I truly believe it is a setup for bigger and better things. Merry Christmas!

Friday, December 18, 2009

Pastor John - Tia

I have to be honest: I did not love Battle Studies the first couple of times that I listened to it. I don't know why that surprised me, though. With the exception of Room For Squares, I haven't liked any of Pastor Mayer's cds the first time through. I have yet to figure out why that is. It always takes a couple of listens before I have that, "YOU BETTER PREACH" moment.

So on my 14 hour drive back to Atlanta on Wednesday I decided it was time to REALLY listen to Battle Studies. I had my "shata" moment at about hour 3. John is PREACHING!!! Y'all better listen. I love this album. It plays like a natural continuation of Continuum in my book. And I think it shows a lot of growth on his part.

Hands down Assassins is my favorite track. I easily listened to it 30 times between Maryland and Virginia.

Oh and can we talk about how he did songs from Battle Studies on the cruise...How did I miss that...? Oh wait....the Long Island Iced Tea in the cup shaped like a boat...yeah....that happened....

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Christmas Video of the Day- TLC "Sleigh Ride"
Sorry we haven't posted in a while. I am trying my best to "work as unto the Lord" and I am STRUGGLING. It's 7 days until I go home for Christmas, 10 days until my 35th birthday and 15 days until we can kiss 2009 goodbye. I...can't...WAIT! In the meantime, enjoy T-Boz and 'em.- Toya

Thursday, December 10, 2009

BGLU Birthdays:
Happy Birthday Raven Symone'!

Confession (Toya here): If my TV is on when I wake up on Saturday morning and That's So Raven is on, I all of the sudden get this burst of energy and feel like I need to be doing something. Anything! This girl is a media beast who has stayed true to herself whether she gets the accolades she deserves or not. For this we are proud and wish her the best birthday yet. Go Raven!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

BGLU Approved: Sade - Soldier of Love

Sade dropped her new single "Soldier of Love" today from her upcoming long awaited album of the same name due in February. It doesn't take a genius in the game to know that when she drops that thing she is going to smash the competition because well, she's that bad of a chick. In the words of Jay-Z, y'all got less than 2 months to get y'all thing together. Good luck.

Ummmm...WHO IS THIS?!?!?!?!?!?!? - Tia

So one of my favorite people in the world is here visiting me in NYC. As we lay around playing on our respective laptops she turns to me and tells me that there is something that I have to watch. This is what she showed me:


As of right this second all I know about her is that her name is Jessie and she wrote Miley Cyrus' Party in the USA. That in and of itself seems so wrong. How could a girl with this voice write such a fluff pop song? What is going on in the world???!!!?? Why doesn't she have her own album? What is really occurring???

I'm going to keep digging and I'll get back to y'all when I know more.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

I Wasn't Going to Say Anything Toya

I think I need some help in understanding what stereotype black women are expected to live up to, better yet, reduce themselves to, nowadays because I am highly confused.

Let me start by saying that I have no gripe with Tiger Woods because well, I don't know that man at all. I have to say that I was indeed a little shocked to find out that he has been cheating on his wife because to me he still looks like a little boy who is just getting his adult teeth in. Basketball, baseball, and football players cheating? Oh all day long. Golfers? Really? Just like the temptation of infidelity is no respecter of sport, neither is the temptation to judge and stereotype...which brings me to my point.

I have heard and read numerous comments from Twitter, to the radio, to Facebook about what a "real sista" would've done and why he should have married one in the first place. From what I gather, a real sista would keep her mouth shut and stay for the money. At the same time, I have heard that Tiger Woods' wife is an idiot if she doesn't stay because before they married she was a model and a nanny so what else would she be good for?


Sooooooo if a real sista would stay in an unhappy marriage and take the money and watch the kids doesn't that too now make her a nanny? High priced, but a nanny nonetheless? And that's not only acceptable but expected? Since when?!

I am a firm believer that you should marry who you love but when you do, you better love the one you're with. I don't care about race. Yet, it's 2009 and people are still saying that is what Tiger gets for marrying a white woman? And I am really confused because I thought a real sista would "Bust the Windows Out Your Car" like Jazmine Sullivan and that's why many black athletes marry white women because they are supposedly submissive and docile. When exactly did the stereotype of a real sista change? When Kanye West came out with "Golddigger"? Is this a reason why so many R&B songs today have men talking about all of the things that they can buy a woman because that's all that black women want? Comments such as "that's what he gets. He should've been with a sista in the first place" insinuate that if he would've "stuck with his own kind" (which Tiger told yall is Cablinasian so good luck with that) then he wouldn't have cheated. *side eye* Unless you were hiding under a rock on Saturn this summer, you know that's not true (I'm trying to be sensitive here but if you are confused, google Steve McNair). One could also say, "Ok maybe he would've cheated but at least a real sista would keep her mouth shut and not try to fight him in the street." Perhaps you have never heard of Brenda Richie either.

I hate stereotypes of black women especially when they are coming out of the mouths of and being perpetuated by black people. I hate the fact that this situation has turned into a discussion about interracial relationships. I really had a lot more to say about this until I read Russell Simmons blog (http://http// that pretty much said all that I wanted to say. Like to hear it? Here it go...

White Women Will Bust Your S*** Just Russell Simmons

As this Tiger Woods story grows, race is becoming and will become a bigger issue. For Tiger and Elin, race has nothing to do with it. But, for many, many onlookers, race is becoming the central theme for discussion. Proof that we are not in a post racial society is hearing a lot of people and a lot of gossip sites saying…”if Tiger was with a black girl” or “if Tiger was married to a Puerto Rican.” I don’t care who Tiger is married to. A woman, no matter what race, will smash your windshield if she finds out that you got girls all over the country. Whether they use a golf club, a football helmet, a baseball bat or a preacher’s wife using a heavy cross…you can say hello to the guys at auto body shop for me.

Not for a second do I think that Tiger and Elin are thinking about race. The pain is not a racial pain, but it is a human pain. A pain to reconcile or split. A pain to discuss why mommy and daddy are in the news. A pain to go out in public again. Hearing people say that “this white girl is gonna take him to the cleaners,” is absurd. This has nothing to do with the fact that Elin is white, this is all about lawyers, accountants, agents and business advisors. That little pocket change he is negotiating with his wife right now, $55m to stay for 2 years or $5m to leave, is offensive. Tiger’s lucky he’s not negotiating with Kimora Lee.

That last line almost killed me. So are we loud, unreasonable, manipulative hens or golddiggers whose silence can be bought? What's really good?

BGLU Approved: MAC Cosmetics New(ish) Studio Sculpt Concealer by Toya

35. I will be 35, Lord willing, in 21 days. And even though I still get asked what college I go to around here, I can see myself getting older, particularly around my eyes. I have this fear that on December 26 I will sit straight up, look in the mirror and scream at the horror of looking my age. This fear is nonsense because all I have to do is look at my hot mom who will be 60 next year and thank God I have been blessed with great genes. My grandmother who recently passed was a fox all the way up to the age of 83. Even though I have been blessed with great genes, I don't want to take them for granted. Allow me to take an excerpt from the Book of John (Mayer) and say that I need to "protect my situation."

I have been a fan of MAC Cosmetics for about 4 or 5 years now. Around that time I was DJing in an all girl hip hop group and we would take a lot of pictures. Now I have loved Prescriptives Cosmetics (RIP) since I was about 16 years old. However, I noticed that when we would all take pictures, their complexions looked flawless and mine looked lifeless. Prescriptives is great for everyday wear but in pics, uh uh. Reluctant at first, I switched to MAC. I wasn't so reluctant when I found out that their foundation and other products were significantly cheaper.

Fast forward 4-5 years later. I am growing up and my "au natural" (that takes me 15 minutes to look natural) has grown a little bland to me. I've moved from Lip Glass to lipsticks and have gotten a bit bolder with my eye shadows. But no matter how you paint a canvas, if it has lines and wrinkles in it, it's going to look jacked up. Enter my new best friend: Jeffrey at the MAC counter. 

I went to the MAC counter today because me and Studio Fix powder needed to break up. It never seems to last throughout the day. I started to wear this foundation powder in a compact because I am often running late. Applying liquid foundation in the car is an accident waiting to happen, literally. I walked in and a new face which I later found out is named Jeffrey, asked me if I needed some help. I told him I needed my regular Studio Fix concealer and, any oily skinned girl's staple, MAC Blot Powder. I then turned and noticed a new item in the concealer display. "What's this?" I asked. Jeffrey went onto explain to me that it was Studio Sculpt Concealer that had a gel base. I heard angels.

My problem with my concealer has been that I am dry around the eyes and oily almost everywhere else. My concealer would crease under my eyes, fade, and then needed to be reapplied when I went out later on at night. Jeffrey went onto describe why that may be happening and proceeded to apply the concealer on me. With the concealer being gel based, it added more moisture which made my eye area look less dry. It is great!!!! I used to be in cosmetics so I am pretty snarky when it comes to cosmetic reps. You can't get too much pass me. Jeffrey knows his stuff though.

Me: "Okay, I have been using Studio Fix Powder but it doesn't stay on the whole day. It fades and then I have to use Select Sheer Powder but I also use blot powder and I'm still oily."

Jeffrey: "Well, Studio Fix Powder is dry. It has no emollient. What is happening is that combined with the blot powder that zaps oil and moisture, your skin is lacking moisture. To compensate, the skin produces more oil.


Jeffrey: *awkward pause* " may want to go with our Studio Tech."

The combination of Studio Tech and the Studio Finish Concealer looks beautiful, I must say. I haven't had to reapply for hours and my skin has a healthy glow whereas before I favored a more matte look. Finding a good makeup artist is like finding a good gynecologist or a good hairdresser. Jeffrey can't get rid of me now. Don't let me find him on Facebook. Kidding...unless he transfers to another MAC store and then I may have to do some research. 

If you have oily skin I recommend that you don't do like me and get scared at the word "emollient". It doesn't necessarily mean oil. My skin looks healthier and far from cakey. As always, I would suggest applying both the concealer and the foundation with a foundation brush for a smooth finish instead of with a sponge. You save a lot of product that way and won't have to purchase as often. The best way to blend concealer is to pat with your ring finger for it applies with the lightest pressure which is important around the eyes. A sponge is great to blend foundation after applying with the brush.

Ladies, do you have any fab makeup finds that you are absolutely crazy about? Do tell...

Friday, December 4, 2009

Oh, To Be That Microphone Stand...

Maxwell continued his crusade to be a permanent stumbling block in my (Toya) life when he performed his hit "Bad Habits" on The Jay Leno Show last night . For those that missed it and would like to hear it, here it go. *flatlined at 3:34*

Happy Birthday Tyra!

Yeah, yeah yeah we know. It's Jay-Z's birthday but this is BGLU so we want to celebrate a sista who has hopefully paved the way for Tia and I to have our own show some day. LOL! Today is Tyra Banks 36th birthday and we wish her many more prosperous ones to come. So everybody, get your "smize" on today.

One day we will get tired of putting this picture up year after year but until then...
A Mayer Christmas to all and to all a good night.- BGLU

Thursday, December 3, 2009

BGLU Music News by Toya

Melanie Fiona and The Foreign Exchange Gain Grammy Nominations

Congrats go to Melanie Fiona for snagging a Grammy nod for her hit “It Kills Me” in the Best Female R&B Vocal Performance category and to The Foreign Exchange for a nomination for their song “Daykeeper” in the “Best Urban/Alternative Performance.” category. I absolutely loved both of their albums this year and wish them the best. As for the rest of the Grammy nominees…well, I don’t really care that much for the Grammys. This is the same award show that gave Sir Mix-a-Lot an award for “Baby Got Back”. However, that sure won’t keep us from having a rundown afterwards as always. The 52nd Annual Grammy Awards air Sunday, Jan. 31, 2010.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

What I'm listening to - Tia

Music holds a place in my heart and life that I don't think I will ever fully be able to understand. Regardless of what I'm going through I am never far from an iPod, cd or laptop full of music. That being said, my current album on repeat is Six Strings and a Drum Machine by Britten.

Thanks to the likes of Justin Timberlake, Robin Thicke and if we're being honest (and accurate) Mike McDonald, we no longer think twice about white boys singing soul music. The problem with their familiarity is that when another one of them comes along we may have a tendency to try to compare the current one to the last one. If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then comparison is its red-headed step brother.

Because the playing field seems to be filling up like training camp after draft day, new singers have to up their game in order to not get lost in the shuffle. Enter:Britten. New to the scene but not to the game, Britten brings a voice that makes you remember what singing is all about. Without gimmicks, heavy autotuning or any of the tricks of the trade that his less talented counterparts are relegated to, Britten melodically welcomes you into his world, his heart, his pain.

Equal parts singer and songwriter Britten tells his story through melody and verse. Real One effortlessly pulls you in with him on his search for that one we all hope is out there. As he sings, "Everyday's another day closer to you" you can't help but believe it's true. Get Gone plays like an anthem for fighting the Ms/Mr Right Now syndrome. I'm sure most of us have battled that, "But he's/she's good enough for right now" moment knowing that danger is just around that corner that we're about to take too quickly. And after the games have been played and love has been found, Stick To Your Guns makes us realize that now the fight really begins. It won't always be easy or fun but this love that you've found is worth the fight if it's real.

Amazing arraignments, a showcase of genuine guitar skills (yes, an artist who plays instruments...GASP!!!) and one of the dopest falsettos I've heard in a long time, Six Strings is a perfect introduction from the new kid on the block. Britten shows us his heart and his skill in just six songs (and one fly outro.) The passion that emanates from every track makes you wonder what he could have done with a full album. And because you'll find yourself hitting repeat constantly, you'll stick around to see what else this guy is gonna do.

Britten is currently on tour with Tony Lucca and Josh Hoge. Check out tour dates here. The EP is scheduled to be released on iTunes, Rhapsody, Amazon and Lala December 15.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Hope Calling - Tia

A month ago I was let go from the job that uprooted my life and moved to NYC for. Long story. All I'll say is I was thrown under the bus by a co-worker and it was NOT cool. I walked out of the building the day it happened and cried uncontrollably. I had never felt so lost in my entire life. I had given up my apartment in Atlanta and just written a check for almost every dime I had for an apartment in Brooklyn. Because I lived in NY, I could no longer claim GA unemployment because I couldn't physically get back there to do the required check-ins at the unemployment office. And because I had lived in NY for all of 2 weeks, I couldn't draw unemployment here. I felt lost, screwed and pissed. Pissed at the guy who got me fired, pissed at myself for not planning better and PISSED at God for letting this happen.

I cried all the way home (two trains and a bus. that's a lot of crying.) As I walked in the house wondering if I was going to have to break my lease and move home, my phone rang. It said Hope Calling.

An old acquaintance named Hope had inadvertently dialed my number. Though she had unintentionally done it, her call gave me a modicum of hope in one of my lowest moments. About an hour later as I lay curled up in the fetal position on an air mattress with a hole in it, in a room that was far too cold, it happened again. Hope Calling.

At that point I began to shout at God. SHOUT. I was so angry. I felt so hopeless. I could have stayed in Atlanta and been several thousand dollars richer. I would be close to my dad and my surrogate family in Nashville. Instead, I was unemployed, alone, in a cold city, away from everything that I knew.

I wish that I could tell you that after my shouting and weeping the sky opened up and the audible voice of the Lord spoke to me and everything was great. Yeah, that didn't happen. The days after my initial shouting were filled with more shouting, crying, attempts at worship and a variety of other things that did nothing but make me wonder how the hell I ended up in a city that isn't really my first choice, with no job, running out of money, and wishing I'd never left Atlanta.

Try as I may, I couldn't seem to feel that hope that I'd briefly felt the day I lost that job. Fast forward to Thanksgiving, as I sat amongst old and new friends all I could think about was how I was running out of time and money and unless I get a job in the next couple of weeks, there are only so many days left until I will be forced to move out of my apartment move home to my dad's house. As I played the role and laughed and smiled like I was okay, my friend's father bluntly told me, "You've been mad at God lately." (That was putting it mildly.) He then went on to tell me that I should continue to trust that God not only loves me but would provide ALL of my needs. For reasons that I can't even begin to get into right now, trusting in God and believing that he truly loves me are not things that come simply for me. But the hope I felt that day began to tug at me as he and other spoke words of life and encouragement into my life.

It's late and right now my heart is heavy and my eyes continue to fill with tears at the prospect of waking up tomorrow with the burden of knowing that at this particular moment in time I have no means of paying rent, car payment or anything else. But deep (DEEP) down I feel hope calling. No matter the outcome, no matter how angry I am, no matter what, I know that this time, this moment, this situation is not the end.

I will do my very best to keep you posted but A.) I am not one of those people who does well with uncertainty. I turn inward and as such I'm less inclined to write because I really have nothing to say and B.) My laptop is literally on it's last leg. The cord is frayed from trying to move it every which way to keep the battery charged. A battery that is almost completely dead mind you...Seems fruitless most of the time but in those moments when it does power up and come on I do the hallelujah dance. And right now I will take any little bit of joy that I can.

I will be glad and rejoice in your unfailing love, for you have seen my troubles and you care about the anguish of my soul. - Psalm 31:7.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

You Should Know: Johnnyswim by Toya

Quick, name three male/female duos off of the top of your head: *looks from side to side* Okay off of the top of my head I thought Kindred Family Soul, Peaches and Herb (seriously?) and...Koffee Brown? With a little more notice I would've come up with Sam and Ruby, Matt and Kim, Pete Yorn and Scarlett Johannsen but the fact remains such duos are few and far between. As anything new that can keep us from overproduced auto tuned music is most welcome, the luscious stylings of Johnnyswim are pretty refreshing.

According to their bio, husband and wife Abner and Amanda Ramirez started writing and performing together around Spring 2006. Their 2008 released EP "1-4" (available on iTunes, Rhapsody, etc.) is a beautiful collection of blended folk, soul, and pop songs that are good enough to be played in any kind of weather and good enough to just about any kind of ear. My fave track is "Why'd You Do It?" I can't wait for their full release. For more info on Johnnyswim, be sure to check out .

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

BGLU News by Toya

This Just In:

According to, Sade is about to come back in the game and show you broads how it's done come February 2010 when she drops her first disc since 2000, "Soldier of Love". Now this is bringing some sexyback that we can get behind.

Damita Jo's "Number Ones" CD drops today nationwide and by looking at the track listing, I am most definitely copping this. It has "Diamonds" on it!!!! I had no idea that was a number one hit but I am glad that it was included.

One of BGLU's first You Should Know artist, Britten, will be releasing his EP "Six Strings and a Drum Machine" on December 15th.

Go to his blog to preview the EP. If you need a great pick me up song in the morning, "She" will get you movin' in no time (it sounds like John Mayer and Adam Levine had a love child). Check out his Myspace page for tour dates.

ABC will be airing Jennifer Hudson's Christmas special, Jennifer Hudson:I'll Be Home for Christmas on December 14th. According to Access Hollywood the special takes place in her hometown of Chicago where Hudson goes to different locations and shares with her audience her holiday memories. The show also features a duet with her and artist Michael Buble'.

We are all going to see Disney's The Princess and the Frog right? I said WE ARE ALL GOING TO SEE DISNEY'S THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG RIGHT?!?! LOL!

Disney's first movie featuring a black princess comes out in theaters on December 11th and I could not be more excited. Is it just me or does her love interest favor Adam Rodriguez?

Well maybe that's just my own personal princess fantasy.

Carol's Daughter has released a limited edition kids bath and hair product collection to celebrate the release of The Princess of the Frog on their website just in time for Christmas. To check it out, go to the Carol's Daughter website for details.

Monday, November 23, 2009

It's That Time of Year Again: Commentary on the 2009 American Music Awards AKA the Hot Mess Heisman- by Toya

This year’s American Music Awards…*sigh*. I mean, wow. I normally find much delight in sharing my commentary on what I like to call our society’s “Hot Mess Championships” but this one wasn’t as much fun for me. To borrow from the crazy lady on Wife Swap, this mess was dark sided…and no I am not only referring to the Adam Lambert performance. Here it goes…

1. Janet Jackson’s opening performance: 2009 is the year of the comeback indeed. I hate to say this but Michael Jackson’s passing may have helped Janet Jackson’s career immensely. The industry was very unforgiving towards her years after her “malfunction” (yet, we can’t get rid of Justin Timberlake? I can’t.) but there seems to be a sympathy factor here that has allowed the industry to embrace her again. “In every season, turn, turn, turn…”

I love Janet but her dancing wasn’t nearly on point as it used to be. I won’t compare her to her brother Michael for two reasons: Michael was an unmatched talent but Michael was addicted to drugs that helped his performance. I liken her performance much to Whitney Houston’s comeback performance on Good Morning America however I think she will bounce back very soon. Being out of shape and irreversible damage are two different things. Regardless, she is still the Queen of Pop. Her song “Together Forever” bears a whole new meaning now for all of us I think.

2. Daughtry is about 2 centimeters from being Nickelback but I like them anyway.

3. Ok, I didn’t see a step show coming. Is Shakira now a part of the Rhythm Nation? Whose sorors are those?

4. Confession: Adam Lambert looks hot in that manliner and pompadour. I’m just sayin’. I like a little glam sometimes

5. Too little, too late: Yall know I love Michael Jackson forever but I don’t really get all of the nominations for him this year. Now if we are talking reparations for him not getting anything for “Butterflies” then rock on.

6. Kelly Clarkson: Sooooo Beyonce’ wasn’t available to sing “Halo”? I dare anyone to start singing “Already Gone” and not end up singing “I can see your halo, halo, halo”. Ryan Tedder is DEAD wrong for writing the same song twice and I need him to own up. In other news, yall can stop clowning Kelly Clarkson’s weight. Every time I see her perform I put a lighter up for squishy, fun sized women all over the world. I aint mad at her.

7. Commercial for Dancing with the Stars is on: if Mya wins this, 2009 will go down in history as the Year of Career CPR.

8. I love that Taylor won and is in London. Some place far, far away from Kanye West. Not that he would’ve…well. Anything is possible. I’ve learned not to get my hopes up with him.

9.Alicia Keys and Jay-Z “Empire State of Mind” performance: This was a good performance. Really good. However, I find it interesting that hip hop is so widely accepted that one rapper can get thousands of people to chant “Jesus walks” and then label owner of said rapper can get the same thousands to recite the lyrics “Jesus can’t save you. Life starts when the church ends.” Hmm, interesting. And I know I am beating a dead horse but my joy would be so complete if cameras panned over to Lil Mama being surrounded by security guards.

10. Possible Wardrobe Malfunction Award goes to ….Kate Hudson who is in desperate need of a dickie.

11. Black Eyed Peas performance: Hold up, did this just turn into a rave? What is really happening right now? No hate here. Fergie has been in the game since Kids Incorporated and what yall know about some Wild Orchid?

*crickets* *crickets*

Anyway, I’d be a liar if I said that “Boom Boom Pow” is not one of my favorite jams of 2009 (I love dance club music) however Kris Novoselic, Dave Grohl AND Courtney Love ARE COMING FOR YALLS BEHINDS for that Nirvana “tribute”. You know they’re touchy about that stuff.

12. Oh they gave MJ his first award of the night! Michael wanted me to tell you all “God bless you”. He’s here playing dominoes with me and Tupac. (Obviously I am still in denial.).Something else I am in denial about? Jermaine naming his son Jermajesty. Not okay.

13. Oh look it's Kris Allen. Man he was SO close to winning American Idol this past year but…what? Oh he is the guy that actually won? Did they announce this publicly?

14. Rihanna’s performance: I really don’t have much besides the question “Why is everything so dark?”. I am still processing. The lights on the jacket were cool. Yeah, that’s all I got.

15. Carrie Underwood: I'm sorry, I like my country music relatively wholesome. I want it to only talk about Jesus, pickup trucks and beer. I can't get behind this at all.

The awards had already seemed a bit darksided and out there but then it took a more drastic, ugly turn when…

16. OMG why do I always feel the need to go Old Testament and take the blood of a lamb and brush it over my doorpost when Lady Gaga performs on stage? What is really going on???? Call me crazy but for some reason I could not make it all the way through this performance. I am all for performance art and such but something just did not sit right with me and I am still not sure why. It reminded me of when Marilyn Manson closed out the VMA’s one year and Chris Rock yelled to the crowd “"Take your a** to church!!!” That mess had me rocking back and forth like Miss Sophia in The Color Purple afterwards.

17. I know yall love Drake and all but I still see Wheelchair Jimmy from Degrassi High, sorry. No, I’m not.

18. Confession: No hate here but I haven't bought a Mary album since Share My World. Much like Alanis Morrissette, I have not bonded with Happy Mary as much. I am so glad that she is happy but I think some of her more recent singles have fallen under the category of “Hot Tracks but not Good Music”. LOVE Mary though and her band killed.

19. Wha, what is a Gloriana and how did they win an award for breakthrough artist???? *shrug* Well good for them and a gold star for Nashville. I aint mad.

20. J Lo is up…*sigh* so many questions, so little time. First of all, I have $20 that says this song was cut from the “Enough” soundtrack. I have another $20 that says that there is a drag queen at Play TONIGHT doing this song 10 times fiercer. Janet and J-Lo, I love yall but forget what you heard. 40 IS NOT the new 20. I’m not saying they don’t still have it. I’m just saying it may take a little longer to warm it up than it used to (This just in: I just found out that she was not saying “Louis Vuittons” but “Louboutins”. I have never claimed to be fashion forward.).

21. Whitney’s performance has given me inspiration to finally comment on the Rihanna performance. These two performances contrasted in quite a few ways aside from the obvious contrasts in talent and vocal ability. Whitney displayed more of the strength and victory of a survivor standing in peace and in all white than a gloomier Rihanna did on stage with what looked like a surrounding militia of dancers bearing arms. Whitney looks like she has finally gotten over. Rihanna looks like she still has something to prove and is far from over.

22. I am checking the tint setting on my TV right now. Leona Lewis and Dancing with the Stars judge Carrie Ann Inaba CAN NOT be that orange!

23. Alicia Keys performance: There is sexy and there is slithery (Please lookup Sade if you need a visual). There is a lot of umm,”slitheriness” going on at these awards this year. And why is everything so dark? And wait, are those The Fly Girls? Where's SW-1? THAT LOOKS LIKE THE IN LIVING COLOR SET!!! Now J-Lo, this could’ve worked for you. I’m just sayin’.

24. Eminem’s performance: I have no idea why he is doing this terrible song and talking about licking his nether regions on network television. ABC has lost their minds. However, he is real bold doing his verse off of Drake’s “Forever”. He just reminded us how painfully obvious it is that his verse is infinitely hotter than everyone else’s on there. Still not a fan though.

25. Timbaland’s performance is…still…on…still…going…some…one…wake…me …when…*snore*

26.*Whips out pen and paper* Dear Green Day, You used to rock. I know you are old. So am I. However, all 4 of us are younger than the Beastie Boys and they would still break the faces of your “punk band” if they came up there right now and did “Sabotage”. I think “21 Guns” should be changed to “21 Yawns” because that is how many I have counted through this entire song.

27. Ok Taylor won Artist of the Year over MJ. Again, the fans vote. If you didn’t vote (and I did), then don’t hate. Besides, she is not crazy or delusional. She knows that was a long shot.

And now the moment THEY TOLD US we were all waiting for: Adam Lambert’s performance.

It was at this time that my roommate wanted to come in and talk to me about the movie “Precious”. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that interrupting me during an award show was much like interrupting a die hard sports fan during the playoffs so I listened. I missed the male on male simulated oral sex part and the make out kiss with one of his band members but I did see him put a woman’s face in his crotch and grab another woman’s vajayjay. The only thing I have to say is this: I have the same problem with the name American Music Awards that I do with the name Black Entertainment Television. One would be led to believe that the programming on both is what entertains that particular group of people. For instance, gratuitous shots of big booties, “thug” life, and overtly sexual images among other things, entertain black people according to BET. According to the American Music Awards, every single performance not only represents the best we have as a country but it is what we reward. Bra-freaking-vo.

I looked up Adam Lambert’s lyrics to the song he performed last night and here is an excerpt:

Oh, I bet you thought that I was soft and sweet
‘Ya fallen angel swept ya off ya feet
Well I’m about to turn up the heat
I’m here for your entertainment
It’s alright
You’ll be fine
Baby, I’m in control
Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I’m the master of both
Close your eyes
Not your mind
Let me into your soul
I’m a work ya ’til your totally blown

Call me a scaredy cat but those lyrics are creepy and explain the "not so fresh" feeling I had after his performance. If I was back at home, I would've crawled my grown behind in the bed with my parents last night. Uh uh.

In a nutshell, the type of behavior displayed in this show is what is unfortunately considered mainstream entertainment now and this is why I can and do get behind Taylor Swift. I have to. While she has a lot of growing to do as a singer, something in me has to believe that being a talented and wholesome songwriter who keeps their clothes on and does not resort to making out onstage pays and pays well (And before peole start acting sensitive, I don’t care if Adam Lambert went and made out with Lady Gaga for 10 seconds or if Keith Urban grabbed all of his musicians in the crotch and full on made out with his WIFE on stage. None of these scenarios are appropriate nor have anything to do with musical talent.). I have to believe that the good guys don’t always have to finish last. We need more “good guys” and quick because if something doesn’t turn fast, 2010’s awards are going to be a hot mess in a hand basket. The floor is now open for comments…

Friday, November 20, 2009

How Did We Not Know About This?!

The Roots doing Yacht Rock with Christopher Cross and surprise guest Michael McDonald? Tia and I would've simultaneously spontaneously combusted if we were there. *Sigh* I HATE THAT I AM NOT IN NEW YORK!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

BGLU News-by Toya
Hello all. I know I've been doing a lot of music news lately and not as much personal news and neither has Tia. Tia is in NYC with a busted computer and trying to get her hustle on because of reasons that I am certain she will disclose soon. As for me, it is way too early to start talking about the passing of my grandmother. I may get into some personal stuff soon that has nothing to do with that but for now, I need to take some time. THANK YOU SO MUCH for all of your encouragement, sympathy and compassionate messages. They have meant a lot. This was my first experience with the death of a close loved one so I really needed support. I love you all very much for that.

Res Makes Second Album Shelved by Geffen Available FOR FREE on Her Website

(Thanks for this heads up)

The epitome of a BGLU singer, Res, announced on her website that her second album "Black.Girls.Rock!" is now available as a free download on her website at . She describes it as being a little more singer/songwriter than her debut "How I Do" (if you don't have it, I need you to cop that quick). I took a listen to it today and was beaming to finally get to hear some new music from one of our all time faves. It's a keeper for sure. For more on Res, be sure to check out her site as she has more info about more new music coming soon.
Let's Discuss: John Mayer's "Battle Studies"- by Toya

For where I am in my life, this is the first album by John Mayer that I don't identify with at all and that's a good thing. I'm not fighting with anybody, I'm not fighting with myself, and I have been years from heartbreak *Stops to give the Lord a hand praise*. So maybe that's why I don't love this record like the others. My not relating to this record is not why I don't think that this is a great record though.

Tia and I have always had this theory that the best song on an album is usually around the 6th or 7th track. I'm serious. We had a whole discussion one time where we listed a bunch of albums we loved and noticed that the bomb song on every cd was at track 6 or 7. So when "Assassin" came in around track 6, it was no surprise to me that that was the moment where I actually sat up and took notice. The structure, the vocals, the arrangement for this song is crazy. That was the John Mayer nugget of goodness I was waiting for. While I adore the Beatles-esque "All We Ever Do is Say Goodbye" as well as "Perfectly Lonely", "Do You Know Me?" (does that sound like "Stop This Train" to anyone else?) and "Heartbreak Warfare", I didn't get anymore moments from this album outside of "Assassin". "Continuum" has great moments ("Gravity", "Stop This Train", "Dreaming with a Broken Heart") as do his previous albums. However for me, this record has only one great moment which left me wanting for a lot more after that.

I'm going to sit with this record a little more and see if anything else grows on me. "Who Says" already has. Regardless, I am already anticipating the next record. And who knows? He'll be here in February and a lot of times I have grown to like a song more after I have heard it live. Your thoughts?

Monday, November 16, 2009

BGLU News- by Toya

This. Sucks. : Prescriptives Cosmetics Goes Out of Business

Pour out a little tonight for Prescriptives Cosmetics as it is going out of business. This has been my favorite line since I was allowed to wear makeup at 16. I even worked for them at Macy's as a counter manager for a little bit (yall remember the stories about that crazy lady Gloria that made me develop a twitch?). I am really sad to see them go as I recommend them often. If you are a Prescriptives fan, what are some of your favorite items? My faves are the Super Line Preventor, Moisturizer for Oily Skin, and Magic Powder. All of these products are second to none. Stock up while you can. Oh and make sure to score some brushes. They last a lifetime.

Tia's and my honorary pastor , John Mayer, is holding a Holy Ghost Revival (I mean, have you ever heard "Gravity") tomorrow night at The Beacon Theatre to celebrate the release of his fourth studio album "Battle Studies" which comes out tomorrow. If you can't make it, no worries, Fuse, one of the only music channels that acts as such, will be airing the performance live.

If you haven't heard "Battle Studies" yet, you can check it out for free on Rhapsody. I've been listening to it for about a week but didn't want to discuss it until its official release. I will say this though: "Assassin" live is going to be A PROBLEM. Lord, help.

Friday, November 13, 2009

I...Am So...Scared....- Toya

This is Robin Thicke's new single "Sex Therapy". I am listening to this at my desk and umm...*looks from side to side* IT IS TOO HOT IN THIS OFFICE RIGHT NOW !!!! I am REALLY scared about his next record. If we can't get "Thicke" back then well, this may have to do. Now if you will excuse me, I am going to go put on some Fred Hammond so that I may renew my mind...

BGLU Music News

BGLU Approved: Melanie Fiona- Toya

I'd like to give a strong shoutout to in this recession. Since I have renewed my subscription, I have been able to peep out some artists that I have been curious about. I hate to say it but there aren't too many "album artists" out there anymore; there are only a hand full of artists who I never have to hear a single from for me to buy their CD. Simply good music has been sacrificed for hot tracks and ringtones. *steps down off of soapbox*.

That's why I think Melanie Fiona's new album The Bridge which dropped this past Tuesday is most definitely a keeper. I enjoyed it from beginning to end, especially my fave track "Monday Morning". With a record like this, I can finally forgive her label for letting Adam Rodriguez get killed at the end of her "It Kills Me" video. Check her out this Saturday on BET's Rising Icons 11/10c.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Grandma's Hands- Toya

There is a part of me that is still in shock that she is gone. I miss my friend very, VERY much. I have never felt this kind of grief before but I am doing alright. Thank you so much everyone for your prayers and concern. They have meant so much and has encouraged me to want to be there for people who experience loss. I am not in a place where I can write about this right now because like I said, I am still in shock. I just don't believe that she is not here and won't be here.

"Grandma's hands
Soothed a local unwed mother
Grandma's hands
Used to ache sometimes and swell
Grandma's hands
Used to lift her face and tell her,
"Baby, Grandma understands
That you really love that man
Put yourself in Jesus hands"
Grandma's hands" - excerpt from "Grandma's Hands" by Bill Withers

Monday, November 2, 2009


Hey guys. I just wanted to let you know that Toya's grandmother passed away last night. Please send your prayers out to her and the rest of her family.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Update on My Grandmother- Toya

Tomorrow my brother, mom and aunt are going to Louisiana to go love on my grandmother. The doctors are giving her only a few more days to live. I don't believe it. I don't mean I don't believe them. I mean I don't believe this is happening. I have never ever dealt with the possibility of someone close to me dying. I have been taking note of this process so slowly. There have been so many ups and downs. I have been tired of praying. I sometimes don't know what to think.

I am confident that when she passes away, whenever she passes away, every significant moment to come in my life will feel incomplete without having her here to share with her. I know that this is just a part of life and God has been so merciful with all of us. I am glad that we will all be there together.

Love everyone well.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

BGLU News- Toya
As some of you might know, Mia Michaels AKA "Who Toya would be if she were a white woman" has up and left So You Think You Can Dance. *Tear* Seriously, I don't even know if I want to watch it anymore. has the exclusive on why she left and NO, she does not have cancer.

Corinne Bailey Rae is slated to release her new CD "The Sea", her first studio recording following the sudden death of her husband Jason Rae in 2008, early 2010. We sure have missed her. Guardian UK has an exclusive interview with Rae about her upcoming project and dealing with the grief of losing her husband.

Some girlfriends of mine and I went to go see Chris Rock's "Good Hair" last weekend and wait, before I get into this: Can I just say that behind a whole row of us was a whole row of gay white men? Not going to lie, we were all pretty puzzled by that. My friend Christine barely let the closing credits roll up before she turned around to ask "Ok, what in the hell are yall doing here?" I then added, "Are yall hairdressers?" LOL! Not at all taken aback by our nosiness, they said that they saw Chris Rock on Oprah and just had to see this movie. Anyway, it is indeed a MUST see. Child, you will find out somethings about weaves that you DID NOT want to know. This movie contained so much great info about relaxers, men's view on weaves, and to my delight, their was a sub-plot about a hair show in Atlanta. There is nothing I love more than Hot Mess Championships! Take your girls (and not just your black ones) and go support this film.

Maxwell and his pretty wings have four nominations for the 2009 Soul Train Music Awards. That's cool and all but when in the world is Soul Train even on? ANYBODY??? Also leading with nominations are Keri Hilson and Beyonce'. Check out the story at UrbanMecca.Net.
Ok, I don't get paid for this yet so back to work. Feel free to throw in your two cents in our comments...

Jordan Idol Hits Nashville- Toya

No, I am not going but yall can have at it! Today at Hollywood Disco from 4-6 pm on Division Street. If you decide to go don't be surprised that there are poles in this club. It used to be a strip club. I'm sorry, a "Gentlemen's Club". Like any gentlemen were ever in there...

MJ's "This is It"- Toya

I saw This is It last night and while I don't have time to review it completely and understand that a lot of people won't see it until this weekend, I will only say two things until I do a full review:

1. If you are any type of creative person (dancer/singer/musician/director/filmmaker/set designer, etc) or work with any creative people, take your behind to go see this movie. I don't care how you feel about Michael Jackson. If you are in school, you should get extra credit for it. If you are fully employed in your craft, it should be a requirement. This whole movie is a "clinic" on showmanship and professionalism.

2. It is almost safe to assume that I will marry a Michael Jackson impersonator. My obsession is off the hook right now.

More to come...

Monday, October 26, 2009

Wait for You- Toya

Yesterday, I got into my car after church and called my dad who has been in Shreveport, LA for almost a month now since my grandmother went in due to congestive heart failure. A huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders within the past week as she was alert, talking on the phone and breathing on her own. It was the miracle we had prayed for. So when my dad picked up the phone to give me the latest news, I was in complete and utter disbelief.

Hey baby, it doesn't look like Grandmuffa is going to make it, okay?

"Grandmuffa" is one of the many nicknames we have for my grandmother. It came from my not being able to say the word "grandmother" as a baby and it stuck. As long as I can remember, that is how she has signed every Christmas card, birthday card and email. As my dad started to explain why it looked like my grandmother was not going to make it due to fluid building up in her body and other trauma (which we learned later was caused by a heart attack she had in her sleep), I was still stuck on the not gonna make it part. "Wait, what happened?" I interrupted. I honestly thought that he meant that she wasn't going to make it out of the hospital that day. I didn't think that he meant that possibly soon she wasn't going to be with us at all.

I went on to ask him how he was feeling and he was extremely candid with me. As hard as this has been for all of us, there have been some blessings to come out of this storm. I have seen a lot of growth in my father. While his honesty has been heartbreaking for me at times, it has also helped me know how I can support him. I remember when I asked him if he would like for me to pray for him. He paused and then quietly said "Please". I still don't know how I managed to get any words out after that.

As my dad poured out to me what he was feeling, I started to think that the most important thing to me was that he was not mad at God. I feel that God has been so gracious in giving us time to wrap our minds around the possibility of my grandmother not surviving. Some people don't get that chance. I remember when Kanye West's mom died unexpectedly. He was on the other side of the world. I can't imagine getting that kind of news and then having to fly sixteen hours with that weighing on your heart. God has been so good. My father agrees. We talked as if we knew that this might be it as he headed back to the hospital and he asked me if I was okay. "Yeah, I'm alright." "I don't want you to be by yourself. Go find someone to talk to if you need to."he said. I explained to him that I was just about to meet someone for lunch so I wasn't going to be alone. However, I know myself. I hate crying in front of people so there was no way I would be going through with my lunch date. We said our goodbyes and I sat in the car stunned. I text my apologies to my lunch date and asked if we could postpone. She sympathetically agreed and I remained in the car.

As much as I hate to cry in front of people, sometimes I can only cry in front of people. It can take me days to cry about something sometimes. I feared that if I sat there, it may have been an hour before I would let myself cry. I looked up and saw my friend, Jay walking towards his car that was parked directly in back of mine. Looking back I can say that Jay was the perfect person for me to see at that moment. I didn't have to explain anything to him. I didn't have to try and be strong. I just needed to be honest. Without thinking twice, I got out of my car and walked towards him.

"Jay, my grandmother is dying".

He hugged me and I started crying. I hadn't cried about this whole ordeal not one time. I sometimes think that crying shows a lack of belief. I know that's not true but for me, that's just how I try to keep my head up to keep on believing. Sometimes I just refuse to let myself be sad. The strange thing is my body doesn't always feel the same way. So when I finally do cry, it is the harshest, most ugly cry EVER(to me). Hence, why I don't often cry in front of people.

We moved over to the sidewalk and I began to tell him what my dad told me. My dad said that after she had her latest crisis, she told him to not try to revive her if it happened again. She was tired of being in pain and wanted to go on and be with Jesus. I then told Jay something that I thought I would never admit out loud. "You know, this is going to sound awful but I hate this world right now. I really do. It's just not getting better so if she wants to peace out, I don't blame her." I told my grandmother that since she said she was going to make it, I was going to hold her to that. However, if she decided otherwise, I will stand with her just the same. It's just more important to me that she doesn't give up out of fear or out of feeling she is being a burden to anyone. I later talked to my mother who mentioned that outside of birthing my dad and uncle and simple out-patient surgery, my grandmother has never had a hospital stay ever. She has always been healthy and fiercely independent. She has always taken care of everyone else. So having so many people taking care of her is probably something that she is having a very hard time dealing with.

After saying thanks and goodbye to Jay, I went home, climbed into the bed and stared at the ceiling. "You know," I said out loud to God, "that's Your child. Whatever You and Annie decide on is alright with me. Bottom line, you know what's best. Even if she doesn't want to be here, You have the final say. Yall work it out." Of course I want her to be here for all of my life's coming adventures. I want her to be here to laugh at how hilarious my father is going to act when I get married. I want her to be here so we can talk more about our shared appreciation for Adam Rodriguez (who she has far been hip to longer than I have), and other things we can talk on the phone about for hours. As much as I want her here, only God knows about the long run. I have had to do a lot of releasing these past few weeks. Not just with my grandmother but with other people close to me in my life. Sometimes we try to keep people so close to us. When I get to heaven, God is not going to ask me how I managed to keep up with Tia, my parents, my brother, and grandmother; My fears of letting go and letting life happen has no control over anyone. As much as I love my grandmother, she has her own relationship with God. She loves Him and I don't doubt that He not only loves her but is absolutely tickled by her. I am a firm believer that while God loves all of us, He may not like everyone. But Annie? He likes her lots. She's comedy.

Presently, my grandmother is stable and so are we. She is not in pain and for the most part she is comfortable. I didn't think she was going to make it past yesterday but then again, who am I? I have absolutely no idea what God and Grandmuffa have going on. And judging by what my she has shared with my father, something is definitely going on. I am so proud of my grandmother, best girlfriend, hero, and role model. She has always been a model of what a true strong lady does in good times and bad. While we love her so much, God loves her more. Whatever she and God decide, I am grateful either way.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Update on my Grandmother: Praise the Lord!!!! She is off of the ventilator and breathing on her own. Her vitals are good and she is going to start rehabilatation. I am very happy and relieved. I appreciate all of your prayers. Love, Toya

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

New Music: John Mayer - Heartbreak Warfare (Official Music Video)

You know I (Toya) pretty much get behind whatever John Mayer does. I could not WAIT to hear this because I always want to hear what he has to say in his music. It's like getting a new book of poetry from your favorite poet. I really dig this and the video reminds me of old school Dire Straits. *Still listening* Okay the bridge? Yes, Lord. LOVE LOVE LOVE it from the bridge to the end. Can't wait for the album.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Dear 2009, I Beg of You: Please Stop.- Toya, BGLU

I am sitting here at my desk and I see Tia's Facebook status:

"I'm in the BK!"

And then all of a sudden...


My best friend has just moved 12 hours away. NYC is NOT Atlanta. What in the...

On top of that, my grandmother who is my FAVORITE homie of all time is fighting the good fight in a hospital in Shreveport, LA.

And then on top of that some family stuff is going on that I am also trusting and believing God to work out but that doesn't mean it's not hard to handle. know...I can't even ... I really can't.

*blank stare*
Must Read Blog Post of the Day- Jason Jaggard "Ask. Her. Out"

Jason Jaggard at posted this simple yet profound and yet OH SO FREAKING SIMPLE post challenging men to just simply ask a woman out. What I appreciate about this so much is that this is a man talking to men about dating and not a woman trying to give men a clue. If more men would challenge men, I think it would help them out a great deal. As I stated at the women's retreat I spoke, as iron sharpens iron, men sharpen men. Women can simply polish.

He gives some great and logical reasons why men should step up. My favorite being:

I'm not going to lie-- she may not be "the one." Let's be honest: she probably isn't. But you should still ask her out anyway.
Why? Because right now your tail is hanging where your masculinity should be: between your legs.

In other words, ask her out. It's not that serious.

Ladies reach out your hands towards your computer monitors and pray:

God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. May the truth set some of these men free. Cause seriously? Even Stevie Wonder can see that single people nowadays are in some mess.

Monday, October 19, 2009

BGLU News: Black Girls Rock! Awards Goes Down for Its Fourth Year

I think it goes without saying that Tia and I should have BEEN to at least ONE of these within the past four years but I am going to try and contain my composure. Our girl Crystal "Crys Breezy" Williams over at The Breezy Effect Blog has the rundown on the night that gave Mary J. Blige, Raven Symone, Sonia Sanchez, Spinderella and many other deserving sistas their due. For more info on Black Girls Rock founded by the incredible DJ Beverly Bond go to

Here's a Bit of Bullshishery for Your Day...

So let me get this straight: this nut came out "making it rain" (CAN WE PLEASE BURY THIS PHRASE IN THE OVERUSED PHRASE GRAVEYARD?!) and lost his $20,000 ring in the process? I don't see the reason for the tantrum. He came out like money aint a thing so what's the issue? Aint no way in the world Tia and I would've been up in there held hostage. We would've peaced out singing "Aint nothin' gonna hold me down. Oh no! We got to keep on movin'..."

*Sigh* I can't.

Mos Def in Japan on Embedded ( Toya

There are two things that I am currently obssessed with: fashion and Tokyo. I have NO idea why. Add those things to a doc with Mos Def, someone that I have ALWAYS been somewhat obsessed with, and it's a win-win.

I am going some day. I swear it.

Back to dreaming...

Friday, October 16, 2009

Stuff and Things - Tia

- I got a job. After four trips to NY/NJ and three interviews with 15 different people at ONE company, I was offered a one year contract position that can be extended indefinitely. The job is in Jersey City, so needless to say...

- I'm moving to (you have to sing it like Alicia Keys in Empire State of Mind) NEW YORK!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OF!! THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN'T DO!!!! Now the issue becomes packing my apartment here, finding an apartment I can afford in NYC and figuring out how I'm going to deal with the first real winter I've had to experience in 9 years, because for the last 9 winters I've been in the south or the southeast. I have not experienced REAL cold since I was in college and my mom lived in Ohio. (Lake effect snow, anyone???)

- While I'm telling you, dear readers, that I'm moving, there aren't a whole lot of other people that I'm telling. I'm basically using this move as something of a reset button. I'm surrendering my life and all parts of it to God's will. I'm leaving the junk and the junky people behind me and looking forward. I've laid down my heart and my desires at Jesus' feet and I'm running toward the Father to let him have my life and lead me where he needs me to go. It's refreshing and scary all at the same time. I wish I could expound more on the reset button thing but I honestly, don't have a.) the guts to share it all and b.) the words to articulate it. So just know that this is truly my new season. And I'll run with it no matter how hard or unfamiliar it may be.

- I latch on to songs. I will find a song and play it until it dies. Currently on repeat is Elliott Yamin's Always. Child.....I haven't listened to much else for the last few days. I love the idea of love. I love the idea of someone loving me. And I know love isn't perfect but I want to believe that at the end of day when love actually finds me (or I it, or however it goes) that that man will always, always, always love me. Anyway, this song is the business and is along that train of thought.

I thought I was going to have to go stalk Elliott in Japan, but he's doing the The River's Christmas show in Nashville this year and I fully intend to do everything in my power to be there. BGLU needs to talk to Elliott. He needs to know about what's REALLY good.

- I have moved 4 times in 2 years. I SOOOOO don't want to have to physically make this move. I'm so close to giving my furniture away that I don't know what to do with myself. Moving is NOT the business.

- Bed Stuy. That's all I'm saying.

- I have to continue packing now...ugh!!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Can We Talk? - Toya
Real Housewives of Atlanta: I Can't.

Now lest I start sounding all holier than thou, let me go ahead and confess that I watch my fair share of tomfoolery. Cheaters? Yes, please, and in a DVD box set if available. Daisy of Love? Unfortunately, yes. I can get behind a bunch of men doing relay races for a woman's affections much quicker than if it is the other way around. Making His/The Band? Yes because I am amazed that people still want anything to do with Diddy and his business, umm, tactics. But Real Housewives of Atlanta? I'll pass.

Trust that I have seen RHOA a few times. I saw a few episodes during the first season before they kicked off Deshawn Snow (the only cast member that had any good sense) for having any good sense and replaced her with Kandi Burgess, formerly of Xscape. This brings me to my first point: How is this show called Real Housewives of Atlanta and only two of the cast members, Lisa Wu Hartwell and Nene Leakes, are housewives? Anyone? Is it that difficult to find five actual housewives in Atlanta who are all friends? Apparently, because what happens on this show is far from friendship.

I am fortunate enough to be friends with some of the best ladies one could ever find; one of which I share this blog. Not one of them is "messy" as the old folks would say. Not only are they outstanding but they live their lives in such a way that none of them have the time to fuss over nonsense like these affluent women on RHOA do. I can't even imagine one of my friends being in an uproar over the fact that someone claims that a bad wig is her actual hair. For real? Also, we love each other a bit too much to encourage a friend to record a record when we KNOW they can't sing. I mean, they could cut a record if they wanted to but if they were real enough to ask what we thought, we would be real enough to tell her the truth: "Honey there are so many things that you are tremendously talented in. Singing is not one of those things." And that dating a married man bullshishery?! NO MA'AM! Would not fly! I will admit that because my soul doeth delight in a hot mess, I was fortunate enough to catch the reunion when NeNe told Kim to keep her "legs closed to married men". I'm not going to lie, that brought me joy. But to have as much money as they do and spend that much time constantly bickering and then trying to mend relationships with women that you really don't like is ridiculous to me. That's really the bottom line of why I can't tolerate this show.

Am I a hater? If you've read this blog long enough, you know that the answer is yes. I am indeed a player hater. I HATE when people play too much and that is what they seem to do on this show. They play entirely too much. Life is too short to play around and surround yourself with toxic females. I am glad to say that for richer or for poorer, I have some great girlfriends. When we start making RHOA money, I doubt if that will change. Does mo' money always have to lead to mo' problems, especially their kind of petty problems? One thing I can say is that my girls have integrity and good foundations. If any of them started to trip, I don't think there would be any back and forth and all of these meetings on who said what. Again, who has that kind of time?

But I haven't cut myself entirely off from the show. I have put some friends on alert that if Sheree's ex-party planner comes back that I am to know this at once. "Whose gonna check me, boo?" has got to be one of my favorite television show quotes from one of the best reality tv show fights of all time (right behind "Keep your legs closed to married men"). Also, I hear that Dwight Eubanks, NeNe's hairdresser, is allegedly coming out with a spin off reality show about his salon. I absolutely love salon drama! But RHOA altogether? No thanks. I'll pass and celebrate the fact that I have some great women in my space to walk this life out with sans the drama. Thoughts?