Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Last Night's Idol - Tia

 
Two words: BOR ING. Seriously, whose idea was it to have them do a Neil Diamond theme night? No disrespect to Neil, but his songs are so not Idol friendly. I swear the producers over at AI are sadists or something. It's like they think of themes that will not only torture the contestants but the viewing public as well.
 
And what is Randy's deal with Blinky Bear? It's like that kid can do no wrong in his eyes. I am severely underwhelmed by that child. But Randy seems to think he can walk on water.
 
Hopefully next week's theme will be something that will get the singers excited. Because they were clearly just going through the motions last night. I mean, I didn't scream once during David Cook's performances.

Monday, April 28, 2008

What are you doing? - Tia

So as most of our American readers probably already know, the stimulus rebate checks are on the way earlier than expected. I've even read a couple of accounts of people getting theirs over the weekend. Now I'm not a financial wizard by any stretch. There are times that I can't even balance my checkbook correctly and it's really easy because everything is rounded. So maybe I'm just lost on the premise of the whole stimulus package thing. I understand that the hope is that we will get the money and spend it on things that will stimulate the economy. But here's what I don't understand:
- $600 really isn't that much money. Not in the long run. (And I know that they said we won't have to claim the money on our taxes next year, but frankly I don't buy it.) With the rise in gas prices (I paid almost $60 the other day to fill my tank), the rise in food prices and the general slump in the economy, how is this little bit of money really supposed to help over the long haul?
 
- With credit card companies raising interest rates and fees, how is the laymen supposed to ever get out of debt? (By the way, if you have a Discover Card, Wamu or BofA credit card, you need to WORK YOUR ASS OFF to pay that debt off. All three of them just raised their rates. Discover raised their penalty rate by 31%, Wamu by as much as 100%, and BofA rates tripled. Damn the naysayers, pay off the debt and close the card. Your credit score will take a hit for about 6 months but will rebound NICELY afterward.) Anyway, if the common working class person is getting hit on all sides how is this paltry amount going to help if it all has to go to debt? If you use all of it to pay off debt but you're still in debt, what's the point?
 
- Isn't all of the stuff that they're expecting us to buy made in Japan, China and everywhere else? If we buy all of this stuff, doesn't it ultimately stimulate the economy of those countries?
 
- Didn't we get a "stimulus" rebates before during Bush's first term? Umm....not that I'm frowning at the money but CLEARLY it didn't work as well as it should have because we're worse off than we were last time.
 
Anyway, that's my take on the whole stimulus thing. I'm not going to front, I got mildly excited when I heard that the money was coming earlier. I have been eyeing this black stratocaster for a while now and thoughts of getting it this week began dancing in my head. But I'm thinking that those thoughts are just going to have to be a flights of fancy for the time being. Because even though getting the guitar would take less than a 3rd of my stimulus check, the idea of putting that money in my savings and watching the amount creep up excites me WAY MORE than being a bad ass rocker chick.
 
So what are you doing with your money? Is it going to savings? Or are you going to pay off the man? Or are you going to go out and get that shiny black strat you've been drooling over? Holla back and let us know if you've gotten your dollars and what you're planning to do with it.
 
Laters

Friday, April 25, 2008

Weekend Hotness - Tia
I forget how hot Jason Momoa is until I'm flipping through the stations and see a commercial for Stargate: Atlantis. As my great-granny used to say, great day in the morning!!!! HE IS FINE!!!!
You know I love this - Tia
Word on the curb is that Maroon 5 and Rihanna have hooked up to do a collabo of what might be my favorite song from Maroon 5's last album, If I Never See Your Face Again. Adam's falsetto on the track is sick. It puts JT to shame in my opinion. The track will be on both of their re-released albums. Which, can I just say, I hate a re-release. I don't want to have to buy your album twice. It just seems unfair.

Now Toya will tell you that she never expected Rihanna to last as long as she has. I on the other hand am a fan. I want to go to the show when she comes here. (Plus Jordin Sparks is supposed to be opening. That is if she gets over the whole vocal hemorrhaging situation.)

Anyway, I CAN'T WAIT to see the video for this track. It was filmed on Wednesday so it should be hitting the airwaves soon. And you know as soon as there's an embedded code, we'll post it here.
Miss Mimi and her hijinks - Tia

Okay first off Mariah is freakin BANGING. She looks GREAT to be almost 40. Man, I wish it was my job to look good because then I too would have the bangingest..well everything, as she does.

That said, so far Ms. Mariah is at strike 2 on the singles with me. That Touch My Body song is cute enough, I guess. But I'm not loving it. It's real Senior Skip day to me. It seems like the kind of song that you would listen to as you rode around with your friends while you ditched school. Maybe I'm out of the demographic or something.

And now she's released Bye Bye. Yet again it gets the big, MEH, from me. It's one of those see you at the crossroads one sweet day on the gangsta lean type songs. Yeah, I don't love it.

Maybe I'm just expecting too much from Mariah. I played her Emancipation album TO DEATH. It stayed in my cd player for about ever. But the singles I've heard off of this new album have not moved me in the least. Clearly I'm in the minority though. The album debuted at number one and sold like 400,000 copies. (Not to mention the fact that it's number one on 6 of Billboard's album charts.) I've heard that the album is a grower, after a couple of listens it really starts to grow on you. So I'm going to give it a listen this weekend and see if there's more than what I've heard thus far.

In other Mariah news, I need someone to clear something up for me. Why does Mariah uses a background track? She has some of the most powerful vocals in the world and she has amazing background vocalists. So I don't understand why she needs a background track. I'm not trying to pick, I just don't sing, so I need someone to explain. You can clearly hear her background track start before she starts singing. Why is that? It's not like she needs it. Rusty?



Oh, but I do love how she totally checks one of her background singers around the 3 minute mark for singing her part. I don't know who that background vocalist thought she was but I do know she's probably looking for a new gig as I type this.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Damn a tween!!! - Tia

Those were the words I uttered as I sat on the stationary bike and watched my favorite female idolist get voted off the show. This show utterly infuriates me sometimes. It stops being about talent and becomes a popularity contest about half way through the top 12. You can pretty much set your watch by it.

But then again I don't know why I was angry. And I certainly wasn't surprised. This is America. People with little to no talent sell millions of records every year. *coughBritneycough* And sadly, high record sales = talent to most of the listening public.

If I'm honest though, I'm actually glad that Carly is gone. I've heard from NUMEROUS reliable sources that the record deal that the winner gets is crap. Carly has talent and I think she will do very well without the confines of the American Idol Svengali running her career.

At this point it's a pretty safe bet to say that the top two will be Blinky Bear and my future husband David Cook, whose performance last night was not bad but it wasn't his best. Oh, but there was a point during his performance when I screamed before I even knew I'd done it. He looked in the camera and the yelp just popped out. I didn't even see it coming.

Also, for those who didn't see it, Leona Lewis performed. Clive Davis and Simon Cowell are hell bent on shoving that girl down America's throat. I hear that damn Bleeding Love song every hour on the hour. I have satellite in my rental car and it's on every pop station that XM has. And there are a lot of them. It's not that she's not talented. I've seen her perform live on tape several times and her voice is AMAZING. It's just her material is so...uninspiring. I tried twice to listen to her album when it was on The Leak on vh1.com. The first time I couldn't get through more than 3 tracks. The second time I was packing and cleaning so I really didn't have anything to do but listen and I almost made it to the end. Something is wrong if I can't listen to music while packing boxes. If your music bores me while doing the mundane then your music is BORING. With the exception of one track that I can't remember the name of but I know it's not her song because I remember knowing all of the words, letting me know it was a remake of something that I've heard before, the girl's record is a SNOOZEFEST. And it's a shame because I REALLY like her voice. Hopefully her next project will have more inspiring song selections.

Anyway, Carly I will miss seeing you. But once the Idol tour gets going you can look for me in the front row. I'll be the one with the hungry like the wolf look in her eye when David Cook gets on stage.
Define Irony - Tia
I am in the lovely city of Hot Springs, AR. It is the booming metropolis that you would think it is. I have to be honest, there are parts of it that look like the town that time forgot. But the people that I work with are SUPER nice. And they hipped me to the most bangingest bar-b-que joint that I have ever been to. I'm talking "line out the door every day at lunch time, lick your fingers to the bone, running in circles, doing the hallelujah dance" good. If you ever find yourself going cross country or even lost in Arkansas MAKE SURE you go by McClards. It will change your life.

But good ass bbq aside, let's not forget that this is still ARKANSAS. It's colorful history speaks for itself. So I was not the least bit surprised when I passed Chuck's Bar-B-Q. The confederate flags did not shock me at all.


The pictures don't even do the place justice. You have to see it in all of it's glory.

But the best part is the location. Confederate flags and logos everywhere, Chuck's is located at the corner of Airport Rd and...wait for it....Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Road.

RAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....I couldn't make this up.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Favorite Idolist - Tia

Carly Smithson is officially my favorite female contestant. She was making her way there after she belted her heart out during Shout To the Lord. But after her rendition of Jesus Christ Superstar it is official.

I would love to see a final with her and David Cook. But I fear that since the tweens have nothing better to do than vote on Tuesday nights, we will be seeing David Archuleta (or Blinky Bear as I like to call him) in the finals. I really don't see what all of the hype is about that kid. He's kind of annoying when he sings. And his stage presence leaves much to be desired. But again, I'm not a tween so I'm sure that's part of the reason that I just don't get him.

Ooooh my boyfriend is on...

Laters

Monday, April 21, 2008

Do you ever get really lonely all of a sudden for no apparent reason? It's like you miss someone but you don't know who it is.

- Tia
Songs to Stalk By - Tia
(As if stalkers need anthems)

Toya emailed me the other day and told me that she'd downloaded David Cook's studio version of Always Be My Baby. She said it was okay but not as good as the original. (I'd like to take a moment to say that I told her before the song became available that I had no intention of downloading the studio version. While I enjoyed the studio version of Shout to the Lord, there wasn't nearly as much raw emotion on the song as there was during the live version. i.e. David Cook shouting SHOUUUUT IT OUT LOOOOOOUUUUDDDDD is the business.) Anyway, she said that the studio version of ABMB was good but it has a real stalkerish vibe to it.

Now the idea of David Cook stalking me excites me to no end. I ain't gonna lie. The more I got to thinking about it, the more I realized that there are a lot of stalkerish songs out there. A stalker could have a whole playlist on his iPod as he sat outside your window. So in no particular order, here are some of my favorite stalker anthems.

Always Be My Baby (live version) - David Cook
There is something intriguingly haunting about how he sings this song. It may be how close he puts his mouth to the mike...whew....I need a minute....Anyway, whatever it is I can just see him being all outside someone's window humming this tune to himself. Although, if it were me, he wouldn't have to be outside my window. Frankly, there's not too much he could do to get rid of me.

Oh and if you get a minute, go back and watch the performance. Right before the money note of "YOU WILL LINGER ONNNNNNN" watch his face. The look on his face says, "I'm about to slay y'alls ass with this note. You're not even ready." And then he did and every time I watch it I HOLLER.

Crash - Dave Matthews Band
I always loved this song. But then I was watching Storytellers and Dave Matthews was saying that a lot of people really like this song but if you listen to the words it's the perfect stalking song. I'd never really thought about it until he said that. I dug out the cd and listened to the words and realized that, yeah, it's kinda creepy.

Oh I watch you there
Through the window and I stare
As you wear nothing
But you wear it so well

I still love it though

When I Get You Alone - Thicke
Now here's the thing about this song: The way he's singing it is ridiculous to start with. I don't know who said it but when the song first came out someone commented that the chorus was real serious. He was so intense with his. The words, "When I get you alone" made you wonder if Robin was really thinking, "When I get you up in this here alley."

But beyond that Robin let you know in the song that he was your stalker. And hey, you gotta love a stalker that let's you know where he stands.

I'm not leaving
'Til you're leaving

There is no question that wherever you are so shall Robin be. It's simultaneously comforting and disturbing.

Every Breath You Take - The Police

Every Breath You Take
Every Move You Make
Every Bond You Break
Every Step You Take
I'll be watching you

I don't know the story behind this song so I don't know if this was written to be the Stalker Anthem of ALL TIME. But it is so eerie.

Oh can't you see
You belong to me
How my poor heart aches
With every step you take

Are those the steps that she's rapidly taking away from you?

I don't know anyone who doesn't like this song. But really Gordon, what was going on in your life when you wrote this?

Until You Come Back To Me - Aretha Franklin
This one is an undercover stalker song. It's one of those songs that you just sing along with and don't really think about the lyrics. I know I never did. Then just the other day I was singing it in my head and realized this broad is crazy. Not Aretha so much as the character in the song. (Don't want to piss off Aretha. She'll come for ya.)

I'm gonna make you see
That our love is dying....

And then later

I'm gonna rap on your door
Tap on you window pane
I'm gonna camp on your steps
By chance I'll get through to you

Ummm....it's time to move. When your ex- shows up at your house on your front steps it's time to relocate and see about getting a weapon of some sort.

And I Am Telling You - Jennifer Holliday, Jennifer Hudson, Bianca Ryan and every karaoke singer in America

And I am telling you
I'm not going
You're the best man I've ever known
There's no way I could ever ever go
No no there's no way
No no no no way I'm living without you
I'm not living without you
I don't want to be free

This broad was NOT leaving. And not only was she not leaving but she was also going to let you know that you were going to like...nay...LOVE her for being there. That's a gusty broad.

Invisible - Clay Aiken

If I was invisible
If I could just watch you in your room

I didn't know the Opie Taylor of American Idol had it in him. But that song Invisible had NO innuendos whatsoever. If he could be invisible he would be sitting outside your window....oh WAIT, he already is.

And while I'm talking about this particular song, I have to say that I LOVE it. I really do. I don't care where I am when it comes on, I stop what I'm doing and sing along. It is so cheesy feel good pop. And say what you want about Clay Aiken, he's got a decent voice.

Okay, I'm sure that there are plenty of anthems that I've forgotten. So add the ones I've missed in the comments.

Laters

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

YES to This: Estelle's "American Boy"- Toya

I know my bestest homie loves the Brits but if I personally had to choose, give me an American boy any day of the week. This video is the hotness. I love this girl!!!

Now It's a Problem- Toya

Yes, he sang the fool out of this. Yes, Tia screamed herself hoarse and I literally got up and hugged my television. But then...he cried????

Send your checks and money orders to the address listed on our Bail Tia and Toya Out of Prison Fund Paypal account of the same name. We are looking into it being tax deductible and will have that information for you shortly.

Monday, April 14, 2008

I don't love it - Tia

So I usually love a boy with a sleeve tattoo. I don't know what it is about guys and tattoos but I find them to be yummy. Most of them anyway. It really depends on the guy, his profession and the tattoo. For instance, my brother has tattoos on both of his forearms. I hate them. But Lenny Kravitz's tattoos make me want to belong to him. For me it really just depends on the tattoo and the guy.

The worst is when you can tell that someone got an ill advised tattoo as a teenager/early 20-something year old and then they grow up and hate it. I'm speaking of course about myself. I'm currently in the process of getting a tattoo removed. I got it when I was 19 and it seemed like such a good idea at the time. Now....not so much. So I'm now having to pay 10 times what the tattoo originally cost to have it removed. Oh and it's pain like nothing else in this world. Think hot bacon grease splattering on your skin repeatedly for about a minute. Yeah....that's about right...anyway.

Well word on the curb is that Pastor John got himself a new sleeve tattoo. And I gotta say, I don't love it. It just doesn't seem to fit him. I loved the one that he had on his forearm. And this mess right here made me rethink my whole life:
But the sleeve...it just doesn't seem like him. I understand his whole need to not be pigeonholed into the "pretty boy pop star" mold. But come on, dude. This seems a bit excessive. Maybe it's just me.


Thoughts?
Does this really even need a label? - Tia
Ashton Kutcher is fine as hell. I am not hardly mad at Demi. I might have to start actually letting the young tenderonis holla.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Throwback Video of the Moment - Tia

I'm still not okay with George being gay. Why you ask...because I was supposed to marry him. I was supposed to be Mrs. Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou.

Anyway, with the upcoming tour, I figured George could be the throwback of the moment. This song is still my jam. In fact, the whole Faith album was the business. I remember the black radio station used to play Hard Day on the quiet storm. I dare anyone to say that wasn't the jam.

The show is in July and I seriously can't wait. But I may have to. The good tickets are high as giraffe booty. (Yeah, I said that.)

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Furthermore: My Last Rant on Idol Gives Back and Shout to the Lord- Toya

“But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice” (Phillipians 1:18)

Worst case scenario, because nobody knows the story yet, let's just say that the network wouldn't allow them to say Jesus. On iTunes, they say "Jesus" instead of "Shepherd". I think it is awesome that they released this with the original lyrics. I am always telling Tia that when you buy music, it's like voting. So especially if you think that should've said Jesus, support these kids and buy this on iTunes. David is hitting that money note...gotta go...

Sing Children!!!!!- Toya

If you haven't seen it already, the American Idol kids ended Idol Gives Back with Shout to the Lord last night. I was in complete shock for at least 2 minutes after it went off.
This is NOT curing how I feel about David Cook by the way. Let me get this straight, you want to be hot AND shout to the Lord on national television? David Cook sang that like he loves Jesus. I too love Jesus. And as the bible says, how can two walk together unless they agree? My problem is that if I run up on him on the street, he may be walking with me in a headlock. Jesus be a restraining order.

I have read a couple of comments from people regarding this on some other sites and I cannot believe that some people are really stuck on the fact that they replaced the lyrics “my Jesus” with “my shepherd”. Last time I check, the only one I know that has been referred to as savior, shepherd, king and Lord was Jesus. Pretty sure no one could confuse who they were singing about with Ralph the head of lettuce that Rerun was worshipping during that one episode of What’s Happening. Whew, talk about showing your age…

Anyway, I loved it. Now there are some people that didn’t but you know what? As many times as I have heard people say “if you don’t like it turn it off”…please. The same first amendment right that allows lesbian twins to make out on Jerry Springer in the middle of the afternoon is the same first amendment right that allows people to sing Shout to the Lord during prime time television. Don’t get me started…

Shout to the LORD, indeed - Tia

Okay, I shouldn't have even watched it at work in the first place. Toya sent me the link to the Idol Give Back performance of Shout To the Lord. WHAT JUST HAPPENED???? Did the Idols really sing a song about Jesus on national television? Did that really occur?

And can I just say that David Cook almost got me fired. As I'm watching it, David Cook pulled a...David Cook. He sang that money note and you know we LOVE a boy who will scream in a microphone. Now like I said, I shouldn't have even watched it in the first place. I'm at a site and I should be working. But curiosity got the best of me. Well when he hit that note I had the mental fortitude in one swift motion to pause the clip while putting my hand over my mouth and my head between my knees. When I tell you I almost screamed, in a doctor's office no less, it is no exaggeration WHATSOEVER. Is it wrong to say that David Cook sang his ass off? I mean considering the song...

All I know is if David Cook is a follower of The Way (a Christian for those you who aren't picking up what I'm putting down) I will be on the first plane, bus, or donkey to LA. And I will cut ANY and EVERY broad who gets in my way.

In case you haven't seen it yet:

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Am I that girl? - Tia

There is a guy in my bible study small group who turns me into a complete idiot. I turn into the giggly 13-year-old girl from junior high school when I'm around him. I have to make a point to try to remember that I'm 30 and act accordingly.

He is super cute. He's currently in school getting a degree in something or other...He's told me twice but I forget. He's just the sweetest guy in the world and I turn into this person that I don't recognize when I'm around him.

I usually pride myself in being put together and having the game down pat. But this guy comes around and I'm looking at my toes. Giggling at every little thought about him that pops into my head. Enraptured with the words that are coming out of his mouth. It is PATHETIC.

It's been a while since I've had a crush on a non-celebrity. So maybe this is just some kind of residual build up of girlie stupidity. I'm hoping against hope that the next time that I see him I will be able to regain my composure and act like a civilized adult female.

On a somewhat unrelated note, Toya sent me this quiz
thing to take. It came as absolutely no surprise to me that I am "Crazy in Love." I am so hopeless...like a penny with a hole in it.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Somebody Said Somebody Wouldn’t Last Too Long… My Opinion on the New Kids on the Block Reunion- Toya

Yall, can we talk? Am I the only one a little suspicious?

*Sigh* First a transgendered woman is having a baby and now somehow in the universe Danny, Donnie, Joe, Jonathan and Jordan have managed to put aside their grievances and come together for a 20th anniversary of “Hangin’ Tough”.

Did you hear that trotting? I think it’s Jesus coming on a white horse…

Now I understand that people fall out and later forgive each other especially after they have grown up a bit and realize what’s most important (I’m not even talking about money but who knows?) But this is suspect to me for so many different reasons. One, I remember reading an interview with Danny where he was saying that Face the Music was the first album that he ever played in his own house. On the video on People.com, they asked them which songs were they most excited to play and Donnie said their new classic. He even said that what is different now is their knowledge of music. If this is true are they now knowledgeable about the fact that a lot of their songs really weren’t that good? Even I as a New Kids fan from back in the day can admit that a lot of their songs really weren’t that good and not really suitable for some grown a** men to be singing now. Unlike New Edition who have maintained their grown and sexy, NKOTB’s catalog of age appropriate music is quite limited.

Also, how is this NOT a reality show? Does anyone else want to tune in week after week to see which one of them is going to just reach out and choke Joey McIntyre for being a smart ass? My money’s on Danny. Speaking of Danny, anyone remember when they rolled up on him on VH1 trying to holla at him about a reunion and they quickly cut away to another shot to explain that he was not at all having it.? I guess what I am saying is that I need more answers. .Don’t get me wrong, I want them to do well. I really do. However, how is this NOT going to be a hot mess? How much money and coercing does it take to get five almost 40 year old men together after 15 years to take a chance and get on the floor and do the New Kids dance?

On a completely different note, I will say this: I was a Danny fan. I mean, he was a B-boy and I thought he was really fly. I didn’t crush on Donnie when I was younger because he reminded me of things that I felt I had no business thinking about when I was that age. But now that I am grown? Donnie is that boy! Call it what you want, that Wahlberg swagger is unfuxwitable.

I am almost willing to bet my soon to be in the mail economy stimulus check that this tour does not run until the end. And who is going to open for them? Tommy Page? Like they said, somebody said somebody’s gonna wait and see. What’s gonna be is gonna be..
And finally Steve Perry, if you are listening…BYGONES man, bygones! Get your behind back with Journey and stop acting childish. You too, JT Taylor. Settle your differences with Kool and the Gang and get to celebrating good times again! I'm just sayin'...

This Just In

According to AP-
Wahlberg said he was convinced to get back together with his former bandmates — Joey McIntyre, brothers Jordan and Jonathan Knight and Danny Wood — when they decided to record new music. Wahlberg said he wrote 80 percent of the new material with McIntyre and Jordan Knight.
"I had no interest going out on a nostalgia tour and singing the same material," said Wahlberg, 38.

Okay, I MAY be able to get behind this...


But he added, "We absolutely will do the old songs for sure."

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh...The Right Stuff - Tia

So there are pictures popping up all over the interweb of a more seasoned looking NKOTB. I am so giddy I don't know what to do. There have been rumblings of a reunion for months now but I didn't dare get my hopes up. But with the new website, the photos and the pending announcement, I'm having to restrain myself from doing cartwheels in my hotel. (The fact that it's been about 4 years since I've done a cartwheel and the last time I did one I pulled a hamstring is of little consequence here.)


I must say that the boys look really go to be in their late 30's (and 40's?) But then again, I know from experience that photoshop is the devil. I've got a pic that people always compliment me on. It has been photoshopped to high heaven. I almost feel bad saying thank you when someone says that they like it.


I will be parked in front of the t.v. set on Friday and AS SOON as tickets go on sale I will be purchasing. If there is a fan club that I can join that will guarantee me closer seats I will join. Money is no object. Trainwreck or otherwise this is the concert event of the year. It is going to be delicious.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Headturner - Tia

The computer system that I use when I'm on the road is down for the second day in a row. The server is being rebooted AGAIN in the middle of the day. Now granted, the server is in the UK so it's the end of the day for them. But for the REST OF US, it's prime work time and I want to know whose dumb idea it was to reboot at 10 am. *exhale* Now that I've got that little rant out, on to the post.

Last night Toya and I had coffee with one of our really close guy friends (who I used to have a crush on but that's neither here nor there. Nor is the fact that he used to have a crush on me just not at the same time. It's all moot. Or "moo" as Joey said on Friends. Oh and should I mention that he kinda reminds me of Chris Brown?) We somehow got to talking about relationships. One of the things he mentioned is that guys have feelings but they sometimes don't know how to deal with them. And sometimes those feelings keep them from acting. Basically, sometimes guys allow themselves to be candyasses and not act on their feelings for a girl. It makes sense though. There have been a number of times when a guy has come up to me months or even years down the road and said, "You know, I really used to like you." Now, since I'm oblivious and don't assume that every guy that I know likes me, I usually miss the signs that a guy is crushing on me. However, part of me feels like I should be able to be as oblivious as I want to be. I shouldn't have to decode your subtle signs and innuendos. In my mind you should be a man, grow a couple and step to me.

Something else my Chris Brown friend said was that it would seem that Toya and I have our lives together and because of that we just don't seem all that interested in having a man. What the hell is that?!?!?! So because I have my act together I want to be alone? What kind of ass backwards logic is that? I seriously don't get it. So if I'm to subscribe to that train of thought, a guy does not want to holla at a girl who has it going on. But I know for a FACT that a guy doesn't want to holla at a girl who is a mess and is desperate to be with a man at any costs. So what is it that guys want? Do they want a project? A girl who is wreck who they can fix and who will ultimately worship them for riding in on a white horse and saving her from her wrecked existence?

Apparently the answer to that question is yes. But it's only yes for the candyassess of the world. My friend stated that his current girlfriend (who by the way, is the love of his life) put it out there and flat out asked what he was feeling and told him how she was feeling. She made it plain: stop playing with my emotions and be with me or leave me alone. And then she pulled the biggest pimp move I've ever heard of, she left the country and ended all communication with him. That little reality check shook him out of his state of candyassness and made him realize that this girl was unfuxwitable and if he lost her it would be the biggest mistake of his life. He realized that this was a bad chick. A chick that he wanted to have in his corner. And he needed to do whatever it took to make sure that when she set foot back on US soil she was going to be his ride or die chick.

For the next 5 months while she was in...wherever she was, he busted his ass trying to win her. He even flew to her mama's house to talk to her. That's what's up. He realized that losing this girl was not an option and pursuing her was the only thing that he could do. That right there, is a man.

After we all parted company I realized that how he did it is how it's supposed to be. A true man will not be intimidated by a true woman. He will realize that the girl who has her stuff together is a girl who will compliment him. A man wants a ride or die chick on his team. So from this point on I refuse to be bummed out about the candyasses who are too afraid to talk to me because "You seem like you have your stuff together and that's intimidating." I'm a bad broad. And while I may not have it all together (everyone has their messes) I am a chick who is worth pursuing. As Travis from Gym Class Heroes said, "On a scale of 1 to awesome, I'm the sh*t." And every last woman who reads this post must learn to see herself that way. You are not intimidating to a REAL man. In the immortal words of Robin Thicke, "Babygirl you're the sh*t. That make you my equivalent." Let the candyassess roll on. They're paving the way for a real man to step to you.

Headturner - Joss Stone
Work It
Girls we've gotta work it like we do
Turn a head or two
Cause we're worth it
So I ain't gonna waste my time waiting on you
Gotta make your move
You had my number for
Two or three days or more
If you're a real man you can't ignore mmm, mmm this
Sometimes it's physical
But I want supernatural
I don't have wings but I'm ready to fall
I deserve it all

Headturner yeah
Soulburner
If you're gonna watch me walk
Then watch me walk
Headturner yeah
Are you a slow learner
Come and take my hand
Cause I'll find another man
If you're gonna watch me walk
Then watch me walk

You gotta earn it
Nothing in life is free
You gotta bring your love to me
Baby (baby)
Baby (baby)
Emotional, ooh I got
Sexual, ohh I got
Spiritual, God knows I got it
What you want, baby I got it

Headturner, yeah
Soulburner
If you're gonna watch me walk
Then watch me walk
Headturner, yeah
Are you a slow learner
Come and take my hand
Cause I'll find another man
If you're gonna watch me walk
Then watch me walk

No one can love you
Like I'd love you
No one can do the things
That I would do to you
I'd do something about it
If I were you
Or feel my heels as I'm walking over you

Headturner, yeah
Soulburner
If you're gonna watch me walk
Then watch me walk
Headturner, yeah
Are you a slow learner
Come and take my hand
Cause I'll find another man