Monday, June 30, 2008

This Fool Right HERE- Toya

First of all, please let me apologize for not alerting you all about the one night only theatrical release of John Mayer's DVD "Where the Light Is." I completely forgot to post about it. If you weren't fortunate enough to catch it, it will be released on Tuesday.

It's brilliant- 3 completely live performances in one night at one venue.  I believe he referred to it as the 3 incarnations of John Mayer. The first incarnation was the solo acoustic John Mayer that displayed some new songs that I am already hyped about. And while the new songs were something to shout about, I liked to got up and ran around the whole movie theater over the David Ryan Harris accompanied cover of "Free Falling". The second set was by the John Mayer Trio.  I mean.... maybe watching Mayer in this setting allowed me to hear things with new concentration but I seriously don't think I have ever heard him sing or play this well ever. Musically and vocally he was superb.  Warning: there is a guitar solo on here that had us all praying to marry a guitar player. I will not go into details why but Lord let it be according to my faith.

The third incarnation was full band Mayer and I was very pleased with the songs he chose. True, he didn't play my favorites (I could've gone onto glory if he would've played Split Screen Sadness) but what he did play had special only-for-live show treats.  The song that made me almost throw my shoe at the screen was that "Gravity".  "Gravity" was so ridiculous that by the end there were 3 of my girlfriends in a row with one hand raised and heads bowed in witness.  I wanted to go in front of the theater and give an altar call:

"The doors of the theater are open. Won't you come, won't you come? I see that hand with a corn dog in it. Won't you come"...

Big screen John Mayer was a good look. If it happens to be playing in your city for whatever reason, I wouldn't miss it. As many times as I have seen John Mayer live, I indeed enjoyed this the best.  

Sunday, June 29, 2008

My Soul Says Yes: Brooke Fraser - Shadowfeet- Toya

I decided to check out Brooke Fraser about a bazillion years after Sheba suggested I give her a listen. I was able to make it pass the beautiful brothas in this video to be captivated by the repetition of "You make all things new". Before I knew it my arm just couldn't help but raise up in praise. Thanks, Sheba. Enjoy.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Why you can't have my number - Tia

While wearing this shirt this evening

a guy at Wal-Mart asked me, "Did you go to North Carolina?"

No, you can't have my number for SOOOO many reasons.
Music and news - Tia

I love myspace. You can pretty much find anything and anybody on there. The other day I was listening to music on Nathan Angelo's page (who I got to meet last night; very sweet guy) when I decided to surf his top friends and see if there were any artists who would be BGLU worthy. Enter Zachary Kale. Think Marc Broussard, with a dash of Matt Morris and Justin Timberlake sprinkled in. If you're a Broussard fan I highly recommend you check out Zachary Kale. He debut album is solid with a great mix of soul, pop and R&B and excellent BGVs from Nathan Angelo and one of the greatest voices I've ever heard Jason Eskridge. (Jason sang to his wife at his wedding and I had to keep standing there and NOT throw the flowers I was holding at him. That man was DOING IT.)

If you're in Nashville, he's got a show coming up in August. It's worth going if for no other reason that to hear him cover an Alicia Keys' song and then turn around and put the stank on his song Love Takes Time.

I wrote a review of the show on the new.....(drum roll please)

BGLU music page.

We talk about music so much around here that I figured we might as well have a page that solely dedicated to music. Until we're a full website, which I know we have been promising that we're going to do for years and as soon as I get a mac (and some time) we will do it, I thought it would be a nice idea to have a separate page dedicated to just music. Of course we will still talk about music here, but the BGLU music will be more comprehensive. It's just a test run for now. If it seems counterproductive, you know we'll let it go.

So if there are artists that you think we'd be interested in, shoot us an email. If we like them we'll shout them out. If not..well don't take it personally.


Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Hear ye, hear ye! I need for the following female artists to stop performing IMMEDIATELY AND POST HASTE....

I won't do that. I should but I won't. Genius isn't even the word for this.- Toya

My Favorite Songs Right Now- Toya

I don't care how you feel about Keyshia Cole, if you have ever identified with anything I have written concerning my love life or lack thereof, "Heaven Sent" ought to be your jam.

I have always loved the flow of this song but it wasn't until I was outside my car pumping gas one day that I actually listened to the lyrics. I was almost offended; started looking around and stuff like "I need her to mind her business."

Here are my top 6 songs because I couldn't narrow them down to 5:

1. Heaven Sent- Keyshia Cole
2. Shake It- Metro Station- Don't be a happy hater. You know you love it.
3. Close Your Eyes- DWELE!!!!! I LOVE HIM!!!! (side note, his and Anthony David's records both came out today. You want to have those in your life).
4. Closer- Ne-Yo (check out the house remixes. They will bless you).
5. Royal Flush- Big Boi, Raekwon, and Andre 3000. WHY is Andre 3000's verse on this so ri-damn-diculous???? I love him and his blouses. I don't even care.
6. Never Never Land- Lyfe Jennings. I have NO idea what this man is talking about towards the end. "She's a deacon, she chills in the pulpit. Aww, you wrong dog!" NO clue. However, I love singing it.

Richard. Freaking. Marx.- Toya

Don't hate. It's bad for the skin.

Richard Marx, Dude from 3 Doors Down, and the man responsible for bringing together the entity that which is Tia and Toya together, Kenny Loggins, taped a PBS special here in Nashville called Legends and Lyrics.  I met up with NG and NGR (New Guy's Roommate) who are two of the most photo happy people I have ever met in my life.  I just happened to stroll over not really even seeing Richard Marx and found myself in the midst of a most delightful photo op (hold up, Linda where did YOU go?).  Hold onto the nights, hold onto the memories...

Monday, June 23, 2008

You Can Sleep While I Drive- Toya
I love love love love this song by Melissa Etherige. 

Tia: "Can I please be written out of your movie?  I mean, if I wouldn't have come around the corner and seen it with my own eyes, I would not believe it."

This is what Tia said to me today on what I like to call the Most Unawesome Day of June 2008.  I mean, if I sat here and typed out what went down, no one would believe that this blog was real.  Stuff that happens to me does not happen to people outside of sitcoms.  When I told me friend Lizzie, she said "Who does this happen to?"  Me. Just me. I am positive.  

I know I am being cryptic as to what has brought this post on but seriously, to type it would be to relive it and truthfully, I have moved on. What I am now interested in telling is why I am not on my porch taking drags off a cigarette with a box of Mrs. Winner's fried chicken in my lap, guzzling some Bitch wine.  

I don't know what lesson I am not learning but the fact that a Tag 3.0 (with Vista as Tia likes to add) has already snuck in and sucker punched me is just ridiculous.  Grant it, he is not 12 but the similarities scream "You have been here before!!!! Danger Wilhemina Robinson, DANGER!!!!"  Even though I tried to proceed in love and not fear (there is no fear in love right?), I wound up getting my feelings hurt.

One thing I have recently learned this year is that it is important to pay attention when we pray for things.  It's important to pray and then watch to see not if God answers but HOW He answers.  If we get pre-occupied looking for an answer in a certain way, we can miss it.  So today, on this ridiculous day, there was a song that I could not get out of my head. I know by now that if there is a song in my head, I need to look up the lyrics.  The song was Melissa Etherige's "You Can Sleep While I Drive". I didn't know the words to the part that kept playing in my head so with tears in my eyes, I looked them up...

You know I've seen it before
This mist that covers your eyes
You've been looking for something
That's not in your life
My intentions are true
Won't you take me with you
And baby you can sleep while I drive

Sleep while I drive?  Sleep while I drive.  Huh.  At the risk of sounding too spiritual I will say that after much consideration, a lot of what has happened in this particular area has not been my fault but more of some divine intervention that goes beyond coincidence.  Tia was adamant in telling me that today over and over again; that I did nothing wrong and annoyingly there really is no explanation for all of this... that we know of yet anyway.   "I am so tired" I told Tia. "I mean, tired. Like ridiculously tired. It is a wonder that I don't just periodically nod off from narcolepsy.  I mean, wow!"  So I came home from work and laid on the couch, asking God what on earth am I supposed to believe at this point. What is it that I am not getting and where am I wrong.  Not too long after I get a phone call.  The call was from a girl whose wedding I was asked to help serve food at last year. She was calling about a mutual friend of ours who was in trouble. Towards the end of our conversation I remembered that her husband asked me to share with her what happened to me at their wedding.

The day before their wedding, I prayed for God to show me true love.  There were at least 4 divorces and one tale of infidelity that I had heard of that week and I felt myself gravitating towards that place where I was years ago where I wanted no part of marriage and resented anyone that would bring it up.  "Lord, I am not saying that I need to be a part of real love. I am just merely asking to SEE it because right now, I see no signs of it at all.  I want to see it the way You intended it to be." The next day I show up at the wedding and I don't see the bride.  What I do see is the groom running around like a chicken with his head cut off, moving chairs inside because it was raining. The intent was to have an outdoor wedding so they had to improvise and improvise fast.  I never saw the bride until she walked down the aisle but I saw him in sweats and later on in his suit making sure that everything was just right. I looked around the room and something looked really strangely familiar. The color scheme was exactly what I would've wanted.  And the rain which I think is perfect music, could not have been more perfect as it was the only background noise you heard as they left the doors open.  Determined not to cry at this wedding, I remembered how I knew both the bride and groom before they got married.  The bride was a divorcee who is my age and her groom was about 6 years younger than her. They are the best of friends with similar passions (remember same rib, same passion?).  As their marital counselor got up and spoke she mentioned the scripture that says "There is no fear in love."  And then it happened: projectile tears burst from my eyes.  I mean, I didn't feel them coming; not a sniffle anything. Just bawling, because it was like someone punched me in the back of my head and said "Liar! You want to be married but you are so afraid.  You have been lying all along." The rain, their friendship, and the wedding was like a picture of things in my heart that really only God could've known. The bride told about how she had problems trusting him in the beginning and how he  was patient with her every step of the way. How many times have I heard that you have to be darn near perfect to be married?  The ability to trust has been one of my biggest issues.  I could go on and on about how amazing this wedding was but the point is I got exactly what I prayed for the night before right in front of my very eyes.  

I really didn't want to make this long so I will get to the point: sometimes we can get so discouraged by present circumstances that we forget what lessons we have learned and what God has already shown us.  I needed to remember that wedding today and how God answered my prayers through it. I also needed to remember that it is God "driving" and I need to relax. We don't always get what we want and sometimes we shouldn't.  And the more I think about how much today sucked, the reality is today's heartache is short compared to what could have happened if I would have found out the truth later on.  I am grateful. A tad salty, but grateful. 

"9[Earnestly] remember the former things, [which I did] of old; for I am God, and there is no one else; I am God, and there is none like Me, 10Declaring the end and the result from the beginning, and from ancient times the things that are not yet done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all My pleasure and purpose," Isaiah 46:9-10

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

I am going to marry Adam - Tia

That is all. Thanks Lei.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

I just don't get it - Tia

I love VH1 soul. For the most part all they play is videos. They will throw in the occasional documentary but for the most part it's all R&B all the time. It's the happiest station on Comcast.

I pretty much let it run all day while I'm working. The up side of that is that I have great music on all of the time. The only down side is that I'll be mid-project and hear something that I love but don't recognize and have to run into the living room to find out who it is. This happened to me twice recently. And can I just say thank God for a DVR because I did a lot of rewinding.

Johnta Austin - The One That Got Away
I love Johnta Austin. He's been around for a while but not a lot of people know about him. For whatever reason his solo career is not going well. His solo album was supposed to drop in March. I can't find hide nor hair of it. So you can imagine how excited I was when the video for "The One That Got Away" came on. I figured that he was finally getting the props he deserves and his album was finally getting released. Yeah, not so much. The release date still shows March something. But good luck trying to finding a copy of Ocean Drive.

I have run this song about 20 times already. Oh and Mel B is once again my girl crush. She was my favy favorite when she was in the Spice Girls. And after watching this video she is once again my favorite. I mean, how do you have a kid in your 30s and then bounce back with a figure like that? Can I get her trainer?

Robin Thicke - I'm Not Loving You
Okay I didn't even know this Robin Thicke song existed. And we consider ourselves some Robin Thicke fans around here. I mean, from way back. So when I heard his voice this morning singing a song I didn't recognize I went tearing into the living room and almost ran into the couch. Apparently this was a B side. (BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) It was released on the Wanna Love You Girl single. In my opinion this should have been a radio single. The live VH1 version is sick. But I'm just going to have to settle for the studio version. Amazon has the Wanna Love You Girl single for $2. I figure that's a small price to pay for good music even though I've already got about a million versions of WLYG.

It's probably because I don't work in the industry that I don't understand record labels. Why would they sit on amazing artists like Johnta Austin but ply us to the gills with wack-ass folks like Lil Wayne. Seriously, if I hear or see one more person singing that DAMN Lollipop song I'm going to go postal. Someone is catching an ass whooping. That's all I'm saying. But we get stuck with crap on the radio and never know that there are some great artists out there in every genre. Artists who toil in the studio and on the road and never see the success they deserve.

I'm working on a BGLU idea to get more artists out there to socially conscious readers such as yourselves. I won't go into detail just yet. But trust me you'll be the first to know. But for now, I need to get back to work. They don't pay me to blog.


Saturday, June 14, 2008

Random Early Morning Ramblings - Tia
So I have been on the road for about the last 2 weeks. I was beat when I got home yesterday. But for some unknown reason I couldn't get to sleep until almost 3 and I woke up at 8. Yeah, not the business. So until my body realizes that it needs to go back to sleep, I'll type.

Switching to Macs
I need a new computer. DESPERATELY. My Dell is slow and dying. And there's an issue with the power cord at the back of the laptop that apparently is very common with the model that I have. Pretty sure it costs about $300 to get it fix. PASS!!! I decided a long time ago that my next laptop was going to be a mac and since I want the Mac that cost about a month's salary, I refuse to spend $300 on a laptop that's not...well...that's not a mac. But if you want to donate to the BGLU cause I will happily send you my paypal address. Be a blessing. I kid, I kid....unless you're gonna do it.

VH1 countdown
It is no secret that I pretty much loathe MTV, VH1, BET. The first two hardly ever play music videos. (I was flipping through the stations a couple of days ago and saw a commercial on MTV that said "Music 24 hours a day." ummmm.....SINCE WHEN???? DOES NOT COUNT!!!) And BET, well don't even get me started. Anyway, VH1's only saving grace, in my eyes anyway, was the top 20 countdown. It was 2 hours of videos pretty much uninterrupted. I loved Ahmir and thought he was perfect for the show. Knowledgeable, likable, great on-screen delivery. Then he left and they replaced him with that Alison Becker girl. And she is now the SOLE reason that I DON'T watch the countdown. For a supposed comedienne, she's not funny and her timing is God awful. The things that she says that are clearly supposed to prompt laughter fall flat every time and just come off like she's reading cue cards. Maybe it's the music snob side of me that usually lies dormant unlike some people's *coughTOYAcough* but the chick makes me wish Ahmir would come back because she's ruining the show. GET A NEW HOST VH1!!!!!

(Sorry. The countdown is currently on at the moment and I'm sleep deprived and she's pissing me off.)

I was watching Felicity last night. She should have picked Noel.

Yeah, NG is officially off the radar. After a week of insane crushing, I realized that it's never going to happen. 1. He's got some issues going on that pretty much put me completely out of the game. And it's not that I'm being picky. I know that every last guy walking the planet has issues and I'd be an idiot if I thought I would be able to find a guy without them. But the stuff that NG is dealing with effectively removed me from the game. I mean took me out of the game, put my uniform back in the locker and had me on the MARTA going home. I love him to death and still think he is fly as sh*t. But I have to protect my situation. And being with him would end badly for both of us. And besides that 2. He has been extra platonic with me. There was the condescending friendship pat. Oh and let's not forget how he referred to me as his buddy. Yeah, I want a guy who thinks, "Damn girl" when he sees me, not "Hey buddy."

I am officially going on the Mayercraft. Myself and two of my friends booked our cabin last week. We are MUY excited. I have hung my bathing suit up on the wall as motivation.
Sounds cheesy, but before you judge it, try it. If the first thing you see when you wake up and the last thing you see at night is a swim suit that doesn't quite fit, it will motivate the hell out of you.

Let me know if you're going. Maybe we can organize a BGLU cocktail or something.

New Kids
(insert evil laughter here)

This video just came on and I could not stop laughing. Now don't get me wrong. I'm no hater. I spent an exorbitant amount of money on New Kids tickets for the show in October. And Donnie still looks good as hell. But this mess right here had me crying. I understand that they are trying to stay relevant. But the silhouette dance poses at the end put me all the way over the top. I was actually chortling. And I don't chortle. And I see ain't nothing changed. Jonathan still seems like he's just half a beat behind the rest of the boys.

Oh, but Donnie, yes Lord. He could holla RIGHT NOW. He was always my favorite anyway. And I don't care that he's pushin' 40. He could hit me up for sure.

Asian Hotness
I was unaware that India guys could be this hot:

I need to start paying more attention to the Asians.

If you liked Adele's Chasing Pavements, then you need to run, not walk, to Best Buy and get the limited edition release of 19 for $9.99. There is an extra disc that has 5 live songs from a show she did back in the spring. And she is tearing up Chasing Pavements at the end.

I see that I'm going to have to start stalking her to get her to come further inland. The only shows she's scheduled to do in the states are in NYC and LA. I mean, folks in the south like good music too.

I hate Madonna's new song Give It 2 Me. Pity. I loved 4 Minutes.


Apparently this is the year of black girl singer/songwriters. Frankly, I'm all about it. I stumbled across Hope one afternoon after my daily stalking of Angel Taylor. (Apparently they're myspace top friend BFs or something.) Her music is simple acoustic pop. It's Saturday morning, sit on the couch in your PJs, drinking a cappuccino music. (At least that's what I did.) I like her and look forward to hearing a lot more from her.

Did Cherish mean to remake Nsync's Gone? For real, watch the Cherish video

and then watch Gone. Not only do the videos look alike, but there are parts of the Cherish song that you can actually sing over the Nsync song. Did they think there wasn't a cross population of fans or something? Like Nsync fans would never listen to a Cherish song and vice versa? Funny.....but not slick.

I working on a post about dating in the Christian world. Bear with me. it may take a while. But I have a question for our Christian readers: Am I the only person who is more than a little creeped out by concept of "courting"? By that I mean, do people "in leadership" really think I'm going to get their "permission" to date someone? I understand the need for godly counsel, but really...? Maybe I'm misinterpreting the idea of "courting" (I hate that word by the way. So archaic sounding.) but there's something controlling, creepy and almost cult-like about the how a lot of people in a couple of churches that I've been in view dating/courting. And I buck up against it every time. I'll expound more on this later, but I hope I'm not the only one.

I'm not even a little surprised that R. Kelly was acquitted. But I bet he'll think twice about peeing on somebody on camera in the future.

Okay, I'm feeling like I might be able to go back to sleep.


Friday, June 13, 2008

Monday, June 9, 2008



The Sunday Paper is selling $50 gas cards for $25. I don't have to tell you that that's the business. At $4/gallon it costs me $80 to fill my tank. I can't tell you the last time I had a full tank of gas. (Damn you big oil!!!)

Of course there is a catch. You have to be one of the first people to log on with they go on sale every morning at 10. They sell them until they're gone and they're pretty much gone before 10:30. I logged on this morning at 9:59 and the site was DRAGGING. I'm surprised the server didn't crash with all of the traffic. I know The Sunday Paper has a huge circulation and anybody with a vehicle likes the idea of cheap gas. So when I got on and saw that the site was moving slowly I figured I wasn't going to be able to get one. But the page finally loaded and I was able to get a card. Yeaaaa!!

There is a limit of of one card per person per day. So if you want to be down, you need to be sitting in front of your computer before 10 and be ready to hit refresh at the right moment.

The site is and I would recommend setting up a username prior to trying to get a gas card. It will save you a step which will save you some time which will (hopefully) increase your chances of getting some cheap gas.

I know I will be right back on the site tomorrow trying to get another card. Hey, times is hard on the boulevard and I need petrol.


Dear Lover- Toya

Dear Lover is a song by the magnificent Teena Marie. Funny enough, I was out tonight and heard Square Biz. There is NEVER a bad time to hear Square Biz. If you have never heard Square Biz, look it up. Then Missy Elliott's verse on Ciara's "One Two Step" will make all of the sense in the world.

Before I get into this, on BGLU, we have always tried to keep it real and as we get older, we will probably be more candid than ever. Cause hey, who do we really have to impress? This is why Tia and I can't wait to grow old together so we can say whatever we want and blame it on age.

Text to Tia: "I would've really liked some good married sex today".

Today was a rough day. A ROUGH day. I am working on a project consisting of a lot of different people with majorly different personalities. One of the things I learned from being an artist in a group situation is that if you really say you love people, you have to bear with them in the way they communicate. Some people are laid back and pretty aloof about things. Some people are a little more emotional and combative. The point is, when you are working with people, it is important to remember that everybody is not like you. As a leader or facilitator, it's important to remember this if you are trying to come to some sort of favorable result.

I had about four fires to put out this weekend concerning this project and it left me drained. I was tired. I was alone in my house and I had no one to go whine to. On top of that I was frustrated and thought that perhaps the best way to unwind would be to run around the block. Yeah, like I have ever purposely run around the block. There was no ice cream truck outside so who was I kidding? Then it came to me. Sex, married sex, is a good look. Oh and it needs to happen. It needs to happen soon. (By the way, I would've gone around the block if I had a horse. Hmm, horseback riding. Maybe I should take up horseback riding. You know what? I'm wrong for that. Let's move on.)

After I totally prejudged that lady in my blog post,"We've Got Something in Common" for praying for her husband thirty years before she got married and keeping an extra cross on her neck for him, I started to think about active faith. I heard someone say today that tears don't move God, faith does. My jury is still out on that but you don't have to be a follower of Christ to understand how powerful faith and the power of our words can be. I mean, look at the popularity of The Secret. That book and the Laws of Attraction have crossed so many color lines, religious lines etc. I remember watching it and being able to bring to mind scriptures in the bible that confirmed a lot of the successful principles that they talked about. And besides, we already dream so why not just take a step up and dare to believe? I mean, why ask God for something and not believe for it? Reverse psychology does not work on the great Creator i.e. He's been around long enough to spot the best B.S.

So I've done something a little out of the norm. In keeping with my prayer to "awake adam" I have a journal of letters that I have been writing called "Before You Awake: Letters to "Adam". These are letters that I am writing to my husband that I will not give him until our wedding day. I seriously don't even believe I am revealing this on the world wide web because this is highly personal; probably the most personal thing I have ever shared. It seemed weird at first and I initially tried to be very umm, fake I guess? Like I wasn't completely honest. The first entry was how I wanted our marriage to be a blessing to others and I believe it will. That has always been my desire. But around the third entry it got a little bit more real:

Dear "Adam"
scratch that
Hey Baby,

Umm, you know what? What I wrote is way too personal. Let's just say that I wrote about my day and how I would've liked to have ended it with him here.

All I am saying is this: it may sound silly but it is a hell of a lot better than sitting around being frustrated about it. And to be honest, I feel much better. So if "awake adam" struck something in you and made you say hmm, maybe you should pull out a journal for your Adam and tell him how you are feeling without him. Who knows? It may be just a matter of time (perfect timing rather) before you are able to give it to him.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Matt Morris Update- Toya

You know, around here we take Matt Morris very seriously. We believe that he is a very important and ingenious artist whose time has finally come. We can't wait for the rest of the world to finally discover the talent that a lot of us have experienced through his first CD "Eternity". With all that said, allow me to be trite for a second.

Matt Morris is fine.

Now, I am not trying to take away from him being a profound songwriter and having a vocal range that puts 99.9% of male pop radio stars to shame. But umm, look at his tatts. I'm just saying. We're not blind here.

Through Twitter, I just found out that Matt has landed in Nashville. And since his debut album on Justin Timberlake's Tennman Records is FINALLY done, I will refrain from running up on him in public and letting him have it for making us wait so long for another record. But hey, you can't rush greatness. In the meantime, check out a full length version of the cut Don't You Dare from his upcoming CD.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

I'm in love with the Obamas - Tia

Seriously, I love this couple. They are the epitome of black love and it makes me so freakin' happy. I swear they are this generation's JFK and Jackie. The young idealistic candidate who wants to change his country for the better. The fashion forward wife who loves and stands by her man. They are what's up.

And if this picture wasn't enough

the fist bump when he won the nomination CLINCHED it for me.

Clearly, Michelle is Barack's homie. That's her dude. I swear, that pound she gave him was the most endearing thing I've ever seen. And I'm not mad at the slap on the ass she got when she walked away.

I love me some Obamas.
Happy Birthday to His Royal Badness - Tia

Today is Prince's 50th birthday. Can you believe that? He is a BAD MAN.

I remember being so torn when 1999 came out. It was the same year the Thriller came out and as we all know Thriller was everywhere. And while I loved me some Michael, something in my little heart KNEW that Prince was the BUSINESS. And I have to say in the Michael vs Prince saga, Prince has come out looking the most normal. Who'd have thought that would be the case with all the assless pants and licking and such that he did back in the 80s...?

I think I'm going to piss off my neighbors and play Prince's greatest hits all night.

Happy Birthday Your Purpleness

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Say A Little Prayer for You- Toya
I remember when Rupert Everett started singing this in My Best Friend's Wedding. Where is he? Fine for no reason. No reason at all.

Before I get into this, I would like to say that I don't have all of the answers. This is just a theory at best. Probably more like a theory in progress hopefully on the way to some sort of answer and solution. I am sure we would all like an answer but getting a solution is where its at.

Plenty of single women have a number of disgruntled reasons on why they are still single, mostly at the fault of single men:

They don't step up.
They won't ask us out.
They are just not that into us.
They find strong and secure women intimidating.

And Tia's and my favorite...

Because they are cowards.

Ladies, we really need to stop calling men cowards.

I know, I know. They bring it on themselves. I never thought while I was growing up and told to maintain a sort of mystery as a lady and to never chase men because men like a challenge, that when I came of age to date, many of my male peers would find pursuing a woman to be so intimidating, It boggles my mind because these are some really good guys. They are pretty clear that a lot of the time it's not the women, it's them. They aren't ready.

Insecurity wasn't a characteristic that I attributed to being a man mainly because my dad never appears to be an insecure man. A man just "does". That's what I always thought. Funny now that I think about it, I often have heard my dad say "A man's got to do what a man's got to do." If a man has to make ends meet by taking on 3 jobs, he has got to do that. If a man has to put his foot down in his household making him the most unpopular person in the house, he has got to do that. I think the problem with not just men but our generation as a whole is that we don't really know what our purpose is, who we really are and don't know who to ask. To be a man, you've got to see a man and a lot of men just aren't seeing good examples of what the walk of a real man is like. I think that is why so many of them are acting out in one way or another by being angry and overly aggressive to passive, timid and sexually confused. There is just so much confusion nowadays. If there is something wrong with them then why aren't we praying for them? Not bashing them, not blaming them and definitely not demeaning them but praying for them. With so many of my female friends who are not only single and over 30 but haven't dated in a number of years, I am telling you, something is NOT right.

In my quest to love my neighbor as myself this year, I realized that I had done my fair share of bad mouthing men and thus acting like a victim. After hearing from numerous guys about how I can come off intimidating because I seem to have it all together, it darn near made me want to carry around my bank statement (which is nothing to brag about), put my credit score on a t-shirt(it's a work in progress) and have a list of 3 references available from people who can vouch that I am just a little bit off to prove that I am a functional mess walking around like everybody else. I am far from having it all together. But for every guy that has said that to me, I need to thank them because it's a huge compliment. Evidently they see something in me that I don't always see in myself and it is of value. So stepping to me, even with their best approach, would not compare to what they think I would accept. And I was complaining about that? However with that being the case, what is it that they are not seeing in themselves? Why are some men behaving so disqualified? Praying about this one day, I realized that I needed to stop playing the victim and take the attention off of myself. If I am wife material as I have heard since I was about 15 years old, wise, fun to be with, loyal to a fault and attractive, then why wouldn't a man jump at that? To me, if I was a guy, I would be like "Oh I want her on MY team!" I would want the kind of woman that Fabulous talks about in my favorite rap song last year, "You Make Me Better", where Ne-Yo sings

I'm a movement by myself
But I'm a force when we're together
Mami I'm good all by myself
But babygirl you make me better.....

Not too long after I resolved that I would start praying for men and stop talking badly about them, these 2 words came to my mind:

awake adam.

"Hmm. Ok.", I prayed. "I pray that you awaken Adam. But what does that mean?" In the coming weeks I heard more about the story of Adam than I have ever heard in my life. Adam was the first man to walk with God. He was made in the image of God, a little lower than the angels. God saw that His creation thus far needed someone to watch over it and thus He created Adam and gave him a job. He named all of the animals, even the ones that today most of us don't see any use for like those annoying weird bugs that meet me at my door when I come in late at night in the summertime. I don't think Adam was ever confused about what his job was or who he was. If indeed he had any questions at all, God was everywhere and right there at the same time. And even with the world at his disposal, God saw fit that Adam should have a helper. It doesn't say that Adam requested someone but God saw it fit for him to have someone. I want God to see me fit for a man with a great purpose as well, however, I don't want to later be his downfall. More on that at another time.

So where am I going with all of this? In praying for God to awaken the Adam in every man, I am not praying for God to get to the part where He put Adam to sleep, took his rib from him and then presented him with a woman like Voila. I am praying, interceding for God to awaken that part in every man that makes him aware that he has been made in the very image of God himself. I am praying that He will awaken in every man the will to know God as Adam did, as a friend and as an ever present help. I am praying that in knowing God he will know his purpose and get to work within it. And then, God will see fit to put him asleep and present to him a helper. Truthfully, until all of that happens, what does he even need help with? Oh and trying to be his helper before any of this goes down is a recipe for disaster. Trust me, I know.

So if you are single and bitter, I want to encourage you to watch what is coming out of your mouth which is an indication of what is already in your heart. If you really want someone to love, start with loving your brothers now. Pray for them. They need it.

"Finally all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil for evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." 1 Peter 3:8-9

Monday, June 2, 2008

Gotta love a Sugarboy - Tia

One of my friends who moved from Nashville to Atlanta dragged me to my first (and probably last) frat party. Granted it was a Christian frat, but a frat nonetheless. I now know why I went 30 years and never went to a frat party. It was pretty much what I expected: a bunch of pretty (and some not so pretty) boys playing drinking games. The only difference I could see between this frat and a non-Christian frat was the amount of profanities. One would expect there to be a lot of swearing at these type of functions. But I have to say there was very little. But I think everything else was the same. You have your obligatory drinking games. Your horrible music selections (because there was no DJ so anyone could play anything at random.) Of course there is the guy who wants to "make" you a drink. (It actually wasn't that bad of a drink. STRONG. But not bad. And before you go freaking out, the ONLY reason I let him make me the drink is because I stood right there and watched him make it. Plus he'd been drinking one earlier and it was a really pretty looking drink. I'm a sucker for an aesthetically pleasing beverage.) And because this was a Georgia Tech thing, there were only 2 black folks there; myself included. And the brotha that walked in was wearing a very...ummm...special vest. I swear I had the exact same one, print and all, in the early 90s. It was a sad moment.

Anyway, I immediately find the most mature people in the room. I.E. the guys who aren't playing Beer Bowling or doing any sort of Soldier Boy dance. They were both musicians...naturally. One of them was too pretty for his own good. He is, or course, the singer. (Random aside: Does anyone else LOVE the lead singer of Fall Out Boy's voice? I saw the video for Beat It and he is SANGIN' at the end of the song.) Both of them were exceptionally sweet. And if I were about a DECADE younger, they would be a problem.

As the night progressed the inevitable age question was asked. "How old are you?" said the cello guitarist. "42", I replied with a straight face. With a devilish almost serial killer-ish grin, pretty boy lead singer said, "Well since we'll be broke musicians when we graduate next year (I remember thinking at that point, "Good GOD hold old are these children?!?!") we'll probably need a sugarmama." I must applaud the youngster's gumption. I told both of them that I would be proud to have them as Sugarboys. But like Menudo, once you get too old you will be replaced. They agreed that was fair and promised to cut me in on all profits made from any musical endeavors as long as I agreed to let them practice in the basement.

I recommend that everyone have a Sugarboy or two. They're ever so much fun and sometimes quite useful. For instance, this afternoon guitar player Sugarboy sent me a link to a remix of Maroon 5's Wake Up Call feat Mary J. Blige. The track sounds very raw almost like it's not finished. But for the life of me I can't figure out what, if anything, is missing. And where as the remix of If I Never See Your Face Again basically just had the addition of Rihanna, this song has been almost completely redone. I like it because it's different. Although, I'm not sure if I like it more than the original. But pretty much anything with Mary is a good idea. If this is released as a single I will be anxious to see what the treatment for the video will be. The last video for WUC was not the business. It was too convoluted. There was too much going on and not enough stuff happening all at the same time. Was it a movie trailer? Was it a video? I didn't love it.

The remix is below until the label pulls it down. I'll have to thank my Sugarboy for the link.