Monday, March 3, 2008

Male homies and curse words - Tia

I'm currently on a conference call that is boring the pants off of me. I'm not really paying attention 1.) because I'm so bored and 2.) because the whole meeting will be condensed into efficient meeting minutes that I can read at my leisure in about a quarter of the time it took for the meeting to transpire.


Last week I was needing some male hominess. While Toya is forever the homie and I can tell her anything without filtering, there are times when I need a male perspective. For as long as I could remember, I've kept a male homie. He's that guy who is basically the male equivalent of your best girl friend. He's the guy that you have no feelings for and the feelings are mutual. He's the guy that you can talk with about anything with and get an unbiased opinion. You don't have to worry about him giving you advice based on his feelings for you because he doesn't have any. He just gives you the straight forward unabashed male point of view.

Well, I realized last week that I didn't really have a consistent male homie. I have guy friends but I haven't had a go-to guy for a while. There was one guy in college,Brian, that was the male homie for a long time and to some extent still is. But then he got married and my contact with him became some what limited. While I know I can always go to him if I have a problem, I try to be respectful of relationship with his wife. But Friday I was just having it. I needed to talk to a rational impartial man.

So Friday afternoon I pulled out the phone and called him.Now, I've known Brian for about 10 years. We met in college and he was my saving grace through school and a few years after. Basically up until he got married. I wanted to talk to him about life and the blog and the bullshishery that had ensued. I gave him the short condensed version and he agreed with me that things had been blown out of proportion and sometimes people are just...people.

I told him what one of my friends had called the whole situation (which I will get into later) and that got us talking about curse words.

Now I have mentioned this before, but curse words really make me laugh. Some of them are really funny. As Brian and I were talking we basically came to the conclusion that we didn't quite understand why certain words were bad and certain words weren't. For instance, who decided that sh*t was a bad word but poop, which mean the same thing, isn't? Why do F-bombs offend people so severely but saying screw doesn't? I'm sure that there is some reading somewhere that I can do to find out the answer. But for the most part, I just don't understand why some words are considered offensive. Slurs, blasphemy, and racial epithets I get. Curse words I just don't.

All that to say, there are words that I find to be hilarious. While I may not use them, if I hear them I'm likely to burst into a fit of giggles like a little kid. My current favorites are as follows:

- Bullshishery - Funny. I don't care what you say. Funny. Not even a real word, but sends me into hysterics almost every time.

- Unfuxwitable - And before you ask, Yes, that is the exact spelling. I saw it on a blog somewhere and LOVED it. I can't really use it like I'd want to but it pretty much describes how I feel about myself some days.

- B*tcha**ness - This was the word that my girl Ramos used to describe some of the comments (and actions) that took place after my Honesty post. This is my current favorite word...maybe of all time. Initially I was bummed that the minion of Satan himself, Puffy, came up with it, but now I don't care. This word describes PERFECTLY how some people act. And as Ramos put it, "A spirit of b*tcha**ness is just running wild in the world today." I'm sorry, that's funny and she's right.

And the piece de resistance (or however you spell it)

-F*ckery - I hate Amy Winehouse for this one. I really do. Every single time I listen to Me and Mr. Jones I crack up laughing. This word is HA-HA-LARIOUS TO ME.

Now I know I'm probably going to get some comments and email about what the Bible says about course jesting and cursing (I feel like I've read that in there somewhere.) And I really am trying to work on it. But I'm not perfect and have never claimed to be. And everyone has there thing. One of mine just happens to be words...

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