Wednesday, October 31, 2007
I'm so excited about Christmas this year. I don't know why though. Maybe because this year I will get to see both of my parents and both of my brothers. Maybe it's because I will actually get wear winter clothes this year....and my Ugg boots. The boots that I swore I would never buy but after 10 months in LA, a place where it never gets really cold enough to wear them but everyone rocks them, I broke down and bought.
Anywho, I'm also excited about the Christmas type movies that are coming out. One in particular is This Christmas. It looks like it's going to be a really decent movie. I mean, it has Chris Brown and Columbus Short in it. What's not to like? And the line about drinking until it becomes funny.....well let's just say I have been there.
Shake a hand...Shake a hand
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
ill hear from me immediately. Tia and I have had few disagreements but while roomates,her Monica Gellar clashed with my Rachel Greene on occasion. You don't get to leave notes on the fridge about wiping down the counters everyday and then bake and leave out cookies (that I am free to eat) without cleaning up the kitchem without me saying something all be it in the middle of the night. Damn a free cookie, this is about justice! Well this bit of insanity has crept over into my job.---To make a long story short I have been majorly stressed at work. I have a very detailed position and I am far from being a very detailed person except when it comes to music. (Did anyone know that there are two different versions of Luther Vandross' "Creep"? They later added more BGV'S. I heard a different version on the radio the other day and noticed they were missing from the second verse). There was a blow up between a co-worker and myself last week while my supervisor was gone. When I went to discuss
it with her today, she took a deep breath pulled up a chair and confessed that I can be a bit frustrating to deal with. " No one here is blaiming you everytime something is wrong. Sometimes you don't listen to how something should be corrected because you are so concerned with how it happened in the first place. We all care about you here and want what's best for you. No one is out to get you." Here I am pointing the finger at my co-worker about how she never can say she's wrong(she can't really) but I was really wrong. My insecurities about how I feel about my job performance cause me to be defensive. There have been instances where I have made some careless mistakes at work so when something goes wrong that looks like it could be traced back to me, I go to great lengths to prove my innocence. I talked with my brother about this today because we both know that my being defensive has a great deal to do with my upbringing. ----I have great parents. I really, really do. When you grow
up however there are certain things that need to be reprogrammed because no parent raises their child perfectly. While growing up I got accused of doing things that I didn't do because my parents were sometimes fearful, paranoid and thus overprotective. Without going into much detail, I went through some very unfair punishment for some things that weren't my fault and beyond my control. I think the Lord has been trying to get my attention about this for some time now. I remember being at my desk once and feeling like I needed to turn my music off. When I did, this one painful memory came to mind. Suddenly I felt the Lord say "This has held you back for some time and it is not your fault. You deserve to try your best in anything that you do." It was as clear as day. I wasn't sure what was coming next so I said "Umm, do I need to go into the bathroom to talk about this." I kinda heard a chuckle and then He said "No. You're fine". ---- I've been asking myself lately why am I still at t
his job. It's not anything I am passionate about but I love where I work. I've just been wondering about my purpose for being there because I know it hasn't been sheerly for employment. I think dealing with why I feel the need to be so defensive and the pain behind it may be part of the reason. Maybe God is trying to show me that in situations where I barely feel that my head is above water and I am underqualified for life,let alone any job, I still deserve to do my best without paranoia regardless of past mistakes that I (and my parents) have made. Regardless of past mistakes, He is not out to get me, He just wants what is best for me and is not my enemy. It's the enemy who brings up those insecurities. No one is perfect at life.----So I later apologized and hugged it out with my co-workers and suggested a Blame Jar. When my dad used to curse a lot he had to put a quarter in the Cuss Jar for everytime he cussed. Sometimes he'd have a bad day and just stick a five dollar bill in th
e jar to cover his future cussin. Maybe I should stick a quarter in the jar for everytime I say something is not my fault. I don't know. What I do know is that I would like to learn this lesson so I don't have to repeat it anymore.
(I was walking to my car and this song popped into my head. And because I am the princess of obscure songs, I found it on my iPod and listened to it on the way home.)
To fully appreciate the video below you must meet the following criteria.
1. Must have been born sometime in the 70s - You youngsters just will not get this. Some of you weren't even out of diapers when this came out and thus can not appreciate how crucial this was to an adolescent girl in the 90s.
2. Must have had the Disney Channel before it was free - or at the very least have known someone who did. A cousin, a neighbor, basically someone you could squeal and giggle with.
3. Be a girl - I knew NO guys who watched this show. NONE. I don't even think they guys ON the show watched it.
4. Must understand that though Keri Russell went on to be all serious as Felicity, she will forever be that white girl with the big curly hair who wasn't a bad dancer.
5. Understand that the names Damon, Chase, Albert, Tony, Matt, JC and Dale were enough to make any diehard fan go absolutely butt-noodles.
Monday, October 29, 2007
As Kanye says, "the only thing I wish, I wish a ..... would." I wish you would try to act like this song was not the business. I knew all of the words to this song about a week after it came out. And was it me or did Mase have a thick tongue? He just seemed like he was struggling to talk.
And I didn't trust Puffy then and I don't trust him now. I can't trust nobody that can't keep it at home. But even before I knew he was a philanderer I didn't trust him. He will now and forever be, in my eyes, a minion of Satan.
So it's no secret that I have girl crush on Alicia Keys. Well, I also have a girl crush on Kerri Washington. (Yes, I'm straight...But if guy's can have man crushes then why can't women have girl crushes? I can't tell you how many of my guy friends have had man crushes on my dad. It's ridiculous.)
Anyway, both of my girl crushes and COMMON are in Common's new video. And Kerri Washington plays crazy really well. It's a little disturbing actually. But can you blame her? Common couldn't leave me either. I would be posted up at his house ALL the time. He couldn't change the locks enough. I would wear him down until he just gave up.
What I mean by that is that I seriously needed to pause and say before I call to check up on anyone or even so much as drop a Myspace message of encouragement, where am I at? My life's work is and always has been about the encouragement and success of others. I love that. However, if not directed correctly it can turn into a terrible thing. You can become a person whose self worth is derived from feeling needed (Co-dependency. Pretty certain I've shared enough about that) to becoming bitter with people because you haven't spent enough time encouraging yourself and showing concern with your own well being. I've dealt with both, the latter most recently. I clearly remember a while back lying in my bed feeling "stuck" about my life and got severely depressed. In a matter of minutes, I was emailed a devotional that figuratively catapaulted me out of the bed. In so many words, it reminded me that the gifts God gave us should also be used for us! No one would come to me for encouragement
or advice if I encouraged them the way I have attempted to motivate myself in the past: "Get it together, Toya." "What were you thinking? You better not make a fool of yourself." We can be so cruel to ourselves. I've taken some time to reevaluate and I've had to ask some hard questions and make some hard decisions: if I want to serve and minister to others, am I effectively being ministered to? Answer: No. I was going to the same church for 5 years,not regrettfully but somewhat due to the fact that I was comfortable there. They have no women's ministry and truthfully I haven't really been growing there for a minute. I have wonderful peers but I need to grow up so I would like to be around some women that have been on this journey a bit longer than I. So I don't go there anymore. I haven't stopped going to church altogether but I am searching for a church that will provide what I need. Next, I need to be back in the industry and have a job that utilizes my strengths. Answer: I'm cur
rently looking for a new job. Not because I hate where I work. I LOVE where I work. But it's stagnant and frankly I really am not that good at this job that I am so thankful for. Also I need to learn disciplined independence and how to truly be alone,enjoying singleness. Answer: I need a place of my own. This has cleared my head greatly and has made me focus more sharply. It feels strangely selfish to pray for myself as much as I have been doing. I still often find myself interrupting my prayers with prayers for others. I don't know the struggles that this guy was dealing with but I know he spent his entire life ministering and being strong for others. I've read numerous testimonies from people whose lives he's touched that has led me to believe that he could've led the most desperate person off of a path of suicide. Depression can turn into a deadly snowball. I can attest to that. I was reminded earlier this year that Jesus said to not only love the Lord your God with all of your h
eart, soul and mind, but to love your neighbor AS you love YOURSELF. (Matthew 22:37-40). I'm working on that. Until I get a good balance, I'll continue to intentionally spend more quality time alone learning to love my God and myself so I can healthily love others. Be well.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
(I am so grateful for the free wifi in the Phoenix airport right now.)
I had to go to Phoenix for work this week. It was all kinds of hot out here. I actually forgot that it was October. It was an easy enough trip. I was having dinner with my team members and basically just enjoying the evening. Everything really did seem fine.
About an hour into dinner I found out that this guy that I knew and had crush on for a minute had taken his own life. I was utterly shocked. He was the LAST person I would have thought would have done something like that. He just seemed so strong. Physically and Spiritually.
He was a big block of man. The kind that I like. I remember the day that I met him. We were both on a mission trip in Australia and I remember thinking, "That is a big dude." He turned out to be one of the sweetest godliest men that I have ever met in my life. And by all accounts he really was one of those people that changed the lives of anyone he came into contact with. So I guess that's why no one knew what was really going on underneath the seemingly still waters. The outside seemed so perfect.
I had a hard time when I heard the news. We weren't even that close. But something inside began to inexplicably ache when I found out. The thing that I hate about suicide is that it leaves more questions than it answers. And the people who are left behind have no choice but to grieve and then move on because the answers that you so desperately seek will never come. You can't ask the person why and so you're left with speculation for the rest of your life.
Depression is an ugly thing. I battled it for a while. You don't have any answers and things, be they real or simply perceived, seem hopeless. And as a Christian, I was under the false impression that because I was supposed to have "the mind of Christ" that there should be no problems. That all I had to do was send up a prayer and everything should be fine. And if things weren't fine there was something that I was doing wrong. I have since come to realize that depression is no respecter of persons. And that though God wants us to walk in peace, there are times when that's just simply not easily attainable.
I had to realize that while there was indeed prayer and the prayers of a righteous man are powerful and effective(James 5:16), sometimes something more is needed. I needed people. People that I could look to and lean on for support and prayer. And eventually I had to talk it out. I had to find someone who was qualified to help me through it. While I love my pastors, they are just people and the answer is sometimes not just prayer alone. Ultimately I had to figure what was going to help me protect my situation so that I could be the person that God created me to be.
My heart is still really aches about what has happened. But I look to God for comfort. Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort who comforts us in all our troubles - 2 Cor 1:3-4. And I have no doubt that we'll meet again in heaven.
So protect your situation. Know that God loves you and that though things may be dark there is a way out. And the way out may not look like you thought it would but it is the way. It isn't hopeless.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
This is the version that we are all familiar with. The girls in the video were very...wonderbread. And hey, nothing wrong with that.
But as long as I've known Toya, she's talked about the version of Please Don't Go Girl with the colored girl. I truly had no idea what she was talking about. Then one night we were on the phone and she found the broken-skinned girl version on youtube.
Because SonyBMG are selfish bastards (I call people names when I'm tired) I can't embed the video. So follow the link.
The girl in the video is a.) clearly colored, black, Spanish, Boriqua, SOMETHING and b.) old enough to be Joey's mom at the very least. But whatever. If I had seen this when I first became a New Kids fan I wouldn't have felt like I had to hide it. After a while I stopped caring. But in the beginning I felt like I was the only black girl who liked them. It was rough.
Okay, I'm for real going to bed.
Politics and Such
I don't usually discuss politics. Nothing irritates people more than religion and politics. So I usually don't bother with the politics. As far as religion goes, Jesus is Lord. If you don't like it, you are in the wrong place. (Oooh, cute British boy on Law and Order. Sorry, I get distracted easily. It's the accent.)
I want to preface what I'm about to say with this: I am not endorsing anyone in particular. I will say that the only people on my radar with now are Hillary, Ron Paul and Barack Obama. And I'm not going to front, I really want a Barack the Vote shirt. But since I haven't fully made up my mind yet, I will hold off on the t-shirt.
I will say this though, make sure you pay attention. We have to change the system. It cost a million dollars to fill your tank. Innocent men and women are dying in a war that most of us don't understand and don't agree with. I'm surprised that we haven't been burnt to bits with how bad the environment is. Do we even have an ozone layer left? Just wondering. Healthcare is shoddy and unattainable for some. And don't EVEN get me started on how I'm supporting someone's grandparents but at the rate we're going there won't be any money left for me when I get old.
All I'm saying is that we need to make a difference in the next election. We have to get out, learn the issues and vote. And please don't come to me with that, "My vote doesn't count" nonsense. You see what happened last time. Minorities are grossly underrepresented at election time. But I bet a WHOLE bunch of people of color who didn't vote for the leader of the free world, voted to make sure Fantasia won American Idol. Say something...
Learn the facts, know the candidates, go out and vote.
PC'ed to death
Is it wrong that I would rather be called a Black American than an African American? While I am in NO WAY denying my CLEARLY African roots, the term seems antiquated and archaic at this point. I mean, unless your parents are off the boat African, are you really an African American? And besides, my mom's side of the family is also white and and Native American. My mom's grandfather was full blood Cherokee or Choctaw or something. Which actually makes me 1/8 Native American, which means I should qualify for some kind scholarship, right? Anyway, am I being too picky with the Black American thing?
What is up with churches not preaching/teaching anymore? Maybe it's because I've grown up in church, but I don't want a bunch of stories or disjointed points thinly veiled as a sermon. Now I'm not saying I want to be brow beaten into submission when I go to church. But I would like to learn about the word. I would like to know more about Jesus and growing spiritually and about how to love God's people more. I guess I just want to feel like the time I spend in church is going to help me grow and further God's kingdom. Maybe it's just late and I'm whiny because I'm tired.
John Mayer was right
All you need is love is a lie.
Giggly girl song of the moment
I have turned into the giggliest of girls. Toya says it's because I have finally realized what it means to truly be happy. She may be right. I have fallen head over heals in love with the color pink. (What, did y'all think I was going to type some guy's name here. Trust, where there is a name to type, it will be typed.) Anyway, I love the color pink. This is of course after years of giving Toya grief about wearing pink all of the time. I actually love flowers and such. But what in my opinion is the girliest thing about it is that I have a girlie theme song. It's Colbie Caillat's Bubbly. I freakin' love this song right now. I seriously can not get enough it. It reminds me of being in love (which makes me want a boyfriend but I've already discussed that.) It is so, for lack of a better word, bubbly. This morning I seriously found myself dancing around in my underwear, brushing my hair, singing the song. Holy scene from a John Landis movie, Batman.
I have taken up running and now find myself in a constant state of hunger. Suggestions?
If I am to believe the commercial that I just saw, all single gay men in Atlanta are buff, horrible dancers and looking to hook up with each other by phone.
Does anyone really want to buy coffee cake from QVC?
I just came across a site that offers contract positions in my field in the UK. So in theory, I could take a 12 month job in London, Manchester, Berkshire, Cornwall, basically anywhere there's a contract position. I mean, why not? I'm sure I can find a British boy to call my very own in 12 months.
Late night television is horrible. And BET is even more of a travesty at this hour.
Prince is not that great of an actor. (Just stumbled across Purple Rain.)
I have some of the greatest friends in the world. I went back to Nashville last weekend and I realized that sometimes you just don't know what you've got until it's gone. While I will never regret the time I spent in LA, I'm really happy to be back on the east side. Because frankly, going through life without people to walk with is miserable no matter how perfect the weather is. One of favorite friends said it best, "Having a place that you can call home and people that you can call friends isn't a privilege. It's a blessing." She's right. While I don't know a lot of people here in Atlanta yet, I do have some really great people that I can call and in 3 short hours be with. People who will pray for me if I need it, comfort me if I'm hurting, and make me laugh until I'm hoarse. And knowing that they're near by is the best feeling in the world.
Hogan Knows Best
Oddly enough, I don't hate Brooke Hogan. I thought I would, but I fooled around watched HKB on Friday while my internet was down.( I couldn't work. No internet, no work.) As far as barely singing pop stars go, she's pretty palatable.
(oooh, I Would Die 4 U is on. It seriously is top 3 favorite Prince songs.)
I have no words for this.
A random iPod shuffle
- Emily King: Walk In My Shoes (Thanks Steve)
- Israel and New Breed: You've Made Me Glad/Who Is Like The Lord
- DC Talk: Free at Last (I RAN this song into the ground when it came out. I still rock it from time to time.)
- Nicole Nordeman: I Wish The Same For You
- Vertical Horizon: Best I Ever Had
- Kirk Franklin: Sunshine
- Phil Collins Against All Odds (Take A Look At Me Now)- Such a Broken Man song. Take a look at me now/Because I'll still be standing here...Even though Phil has made it perfectly clear that this woman is not coming back, he's going to just stand there and wait. It's against all odds. But he's willing to ride it out. That's a shame.
- TobyMac: Wonderin' Why
- Brandy: Sittin' Up In My Room - Donald Faison was in this video. I loved this song. I remember playing it so much back in high school that my mom came and knocked on my door and asked me if there were any other songs on the Waiting to Exhale soundtrack that I could play.
- Kanye West ft. Chris Martin: Homecoming (Again, thanks Steve)
There were a lot of Christian artists this time around....hmmm
Okay it is so late that VH1 has started playing videos again.
Radiohead's High & Dry video just came on. Isn't that song like 7 years old? Which begs the question, why doesn't VH1 play all the videos since they CLEARLY have them just sitting there collecting dust.
Saturday, October 20, 2007
So I was on myspace and I noticed that there was a bulletin from Elliott Yamin's page. So I followed the link where there was a banner for Elliott's new Christmas album available exclusively at Target. I was downright giddy after seeing that.
I know Elliott LOVES him some Donnie Hathaway, so I IMMEDIATELY knew that This Christmas was going to be on the c.d. (SHAKE A HAND, SHAKE A HAND) Oh and can we talk about how I thought the verse was "Fireflies blazing bright" instead of "Fireside blazing bright." Yeah, shut up. Anyway, This Christmas is one of my all time favorite Christmas songs. And the idea of Elliott tearing it up probably makes me happier than I should be. But whatcha gonna do? (Random Aside: Does anyone else think Criss Angel is from the devil?)
So from what I've read the c.d. may or may not be available at your local Target. Some stores have reportedly not put the c.d. out. I've also read that the c.d. is only $6.99. So I'm gonna go ahead and roll over to Target tomorrow after church. I mean, if I can be singing, "shake a hand, shake a hand" in October, why shouldn't I?
iVillage has an interview with Elliott about his thoughts on the season and him This Christmas.
That little man just don't know....
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
So I've actually had to work the last few days. I think my luxurious days of sitting at home getting paid to watch America's Most Smartest Model will be coming to an end shortly. Especially since I will soon have to start traveling BACK to California every 6 weeks. BOOOO. (Linda trust me, you don't want my job on the days that I'm not at home. And Ms. Complexity, I do get bored from time to time. I read a lot when it gets slow. And I surf the web far too much. A lot of my friends are on IM during the day so I get to keep in touch with people. But if you do work from home, make sure you leave the house when the day is over. Otherwise, you will go a little batty being in the house all day, every day.)
But while I have been working more, I still find time to hunt for fun British boys online. I stumbled across this cute youngster called Smivadee on youtube and I am officially a fan.
As you can see, that's where I got the idea for this post from.
I figured I would just hit random on my iPod and list the first 10 (five is boring) songs that came up. The only time I'm allowed to skip is if a monologue comes up. (That could actually happen more than you realize. I have the New Testament on my iPod, so it wouldn't be a big shocker if 2 Thessalonians started playing.)
These are the songs that came up when I put my iPod on shuffle...Oh and by the way the first thing that came up was Mark 13.
- Where Do We Go From Here - Mat Kearney
Album: Nothing Left To Lose
- To Worship You I Live - Israel and New Breed
Album: Alive In South Africa
- Up Where We Belong - Bebe and Cece Winans
Album: Greatest Hits (This one took me WAY back.)
- Budsmoker's Only - Bone Thugs -N- Harmony
Album: E. 1999 Eternal (I actually had to listen to this one. I don't smoke NO KIND of weed, but this song took me back to high school. I lived in Ohio when Bone Thugs broke huge. They were from Cleveland. So you couldn't go anywhere without hearing a Bone song. Man....yeah!!!)
- Drive Slow - Kanye West
Album: Late Registration
- Arms of My Baby - Joss Stone
Album: Introducing Joss Stone
- Neon - John Mayer
Album: Any Given Thursday
- Not Ready To Make Nice - The Dixie Chicks
Album: Taking the Long Way (Say what you want about the Dixie Chicks, they are FIYAH!!!!
- Groove Swing - Roi Anthony
Album: The True Soul Experience (For the most part, even though I have almost 3000 songs, I know everything that's on my iPod. But this one threw me for a loop. I have no idea where I got it from....Steve, did you send this to me?)
- Vultures - John Mayer
Album: Continuum (This is my daggone song. I don't know what it is about John Mayer but he always seems to be able to write an album that speaks to right where I am. When No Such Thing came out, I was dead in the center of my quarter life crisis. Room For Squares got me through my post college trauma. And then pretty much like he knew where I was coming from, he went and wrote Heavier Things for me. New Deep was my theme song. "Numb is the new deep/Down with the old me/I'm over the analyzing tonight." Yes, child. And then Continuum dropped and I wanted to kiss John in his mouth. Vultures is my current mantra. "Down to the wire/I wanted water but I walked through the fire/If this is what it takes to take me even higher/Then I'll come through like I do when the world keeps TESTING ME TESTING ME TESTING ME." Oh and please don't forget "Power is made by power being taken/So I keep on running to protect my situation." When someone is acting up and needs to be cut out, Toya and I are quick to tell each other, "Girl, protect your situation." I don't care what you heard, John Mayer has been my pastor on many occasions.
Anyway, those were my the first ten songs on my iPod. Now it's your turn.List the first ten songs that play on your iTunes/iPod when it's on shuffle. And no cheating. If it's something random and embarrassing, too bad. You have to list it.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
I promise you, just the other day I was wondering where Craig David was. I used to love me some him. I remember I paid like $30 for his first cd. It hadn't come out here in the states and at the time there was no release date for it. So I ponied up the money for the UK version and got my jam on. Of course several months later the cd was on sale at Target for like $9.
Anyway, according to Concreteloop, CD has a new cd dropping soon. And Craig and 'em's website has a release date of Nov 12th. (I wonder if that's the UK date or everywhere...?) Oh and can we talk about how I didn't even know that Craig had 3 cds. I only knew of two.
Here's the video for the first(?) single.
I don't love it. It's the same ol' same ol'. You're hot. I'm turned on. Shake your thang...yada yada yada. (I wish people wouldn't sample David Bowie's great music for crappy songs)...And the look reminds me A LOT of the Hammertime video. Seriously, look at the dancers on the platform with the white background. I'm just waiting for Hammer to come dancing in.
So since I'm disappointed with this initial offering, please accept my apologies on Craig and 'em's behalf and enjoy this old CD video. Oh, and Gordon...DAMN MAN!!!! You could still holla.
Seriously, where is Christopher Williams? That's all I'm asking.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Okay, I saw this video on CNN over the weekend. How the story goes, this little girl was resisting arrest for a curfew violation. After several requests by the officer for her to put her hands behind her back, she allegedly bit him at which point the officer proceeded to punch the child in the face and then pepper spray her.
(I can't find the original version. This one has been edited to make it a bit more sensational, as if it that was even needed.)
I have watched this video a couple of times and have a couple of observations.
1. My first question is where were her parents? I WISH I would have been running the streets at 1 am when I was 15. I probably would have been freaking out too. Not because I was going to jail, but because once my mother got there to bail me out I was going to be in for the worst whooping of my life.
2. EVERYBODY knows that you don't resist the police. When you do you're just giving them a reason to beat you. I mean, sometimes you don't even have to give them a reason. (Sean Bell or Amadou Diallo anyone?) But for the love of God, don't make your cop inflicted a** whooping "justifiable."
3. Even if she did try to bite him, I think the force was excessive. He outweighs her by a good 100lbs. And I know that they teach techniques on disarming a suspect without using that much force. He already had one of her arms handcuffed. And he was wearing protective gloves. So even if she did try to bite him on the hand, as he alleged, her teeth wouldn't have gotten through. So why did he need to punch her in the face AND THEN pepper spray her? And it looks to me like she was pretty subdued when he got around to pepper spraying her. She was probably in shock from the blow to the face.
I think the long and the short of it is, the man used too much force. However, the child should have just done what she was told. She probably would have gotten off with a warning or at worse a citation. It was only a curfew violation. I think it carries a $50 fine.
Maybe I'm being nonchalant. But one of the things that my dad always taught me was do what the cops say. If you get a DWB, deal with it after the fact. Do NOT give the cops any reason to fire 5 warning shots in your back. I'm not saying all cops are dirty and on power trips. But we know from experience that some of them are. And the scariest ones are the ones who would punch a 15 year old 100lbs girl in the face or shoot you for having a wallet.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
What yall need to know is on Friday 9:30 am I was suddenly homeless and packed with nowhere to go but at 7:30 pm that very day, less than 12 hours later I was handing a new landlord a check for my deposit for a place that is nicerand safer than the one I was intending to move into that very day.
Praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!
What I like about blogging is that there is no reason to ever try to be politically correct. I can't credit this to anyone but my Father in heaven. Me, with lousy credit, never lived on my own, getting a wonderful place to live by myself in less than 12 hours? Luck is finding some change in a phone booth. This is Jesus. Gotta go! I'm moving today.
"Late in the midnight hour, God's gonna turn it around. It's gonna work in your favor"- Fred Hammond "We're Blessed"
Friday, October 5, 2007
As of today, I am no longer moving into my rental across town.
As of today, I am technically homeless.
As of today, I am happier than I have been in weeks. And that is not sarcasm.
You can spend your days depressed about the past unwise choices in your life: the red flags, the non-chalantness of attitude when reality is beating down your door. Or you can sit up and say "I am now ready to listen. What is the lesson and how can we not repeat this?" The landlords of the property are too unprofessional for words. For the most part, the red flags didn't come until 2 months later which would make it about a week ago. So really, I could not have seen this coming. I'm just glad that I decided to not sign the lease even though I have no backup plan and must be out of my place TOMORROW.
I do believe that I am most happy because this is now completely in God's hands. If the outcome of this was solely up to me, I would be in a corner somewhere crying waiting to die. Seriously. I don't have nearly as much faith in myself as I probably should. But because I know that I know that the bible says that my God "shall supply all my needs according to his riches and glory in Christ Jesus" I am not sweating one bit.
I'll be back with a praise report soon.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Since I have been talking about fictional TV boyfriends, I might as well post my #1 TV boyfriend of all time, Dwayne Wayne. He is The Hotness in that suit and the way he comes down the aisle to claim Whitley gives me chills every single time. That's a bold brotha.
Oh and my brother swears when I get married he is going to say "Blessed are those that ask the questions, brotha" like Shazza (Gary Dourdan) says. Classic.
Thanks for your prayers. Things aren't better but when they are, you'll be the first to know ;O)
I love that you can find almost anything on youtube.
I freakin' LOVE me some Fantasia. She sings with so much passion. Yeah, I know sometimes she more screams than sing, but that's just what Fresh calls raw emotion. Anyone who can get me singing a song about being a single mother like I am one is more than alright in my book.
I don't know how or when I'm going to do it but I am going to NYC and seeing Fanny on Broadway before her run ends. If this little clip here gives me chills and brings me to tears every time I watch it, I can't imagine what the actual show is like. But I'm going. Some kind of way, I'm going.
And a side note: Please watch how 'Tasia just walks off the stage when she's finished. No bow, no nothing. That child KNOWS she killed it and doesn't need your applause and approval to be convinced of such.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
First off, MAD shout outs to Gina for hippin' us to this.
I haven't watched SNL with any sort of regularity in years. And when I heard LeBron James was hosting I was sufficiently underwhelmed. Most ball players can't act. Or rap. (Don't act like y'all forgot about Shaq trying to rap.) So I wasn't even remotely interested in watching. And because, for the most part SNL is lame, I missed this:
I have so many problems with this I don't even know where to begin.
- First off, Andy Samberg needs to be investigated. Seriously. He wrote the now infamous D*ck in a Box, which won an Emmy in case you didn't know. And then he came up with this. I don't know who he hangs out with, but I need to find out. His little ditties have just a little too much R&B flavor for his own good. And if I hear him call one more person "Boo" it's going to be a situation. I need to know what his story is. He is about to get talked to. Frankly, he knows too much.
Second, ADAM LEVINE COULD GET IT. I know that's not Christ-like, but I'm just saying. That skinny little man can sing his behind off. And he is just sexy for NO DAMN REASON. I want to be a part of his world. That's someone I could get behind; ask him what his interests are, who you BE WITH???
And while we all know he's fine let's not forget his voice is just sick. I seriously could listen to him sing just about anything. And who the hell keeps letting Adam wear that white suit? I promise you, if I see Adam on the street somewhere I am going to jail. Because I will have him trapped up in a corner so fast HE won't even know how he got there.
Jesus be a big linebacker bodyguard around Adam.
IT is currently trying to figure out why I can't connect to my printer. The printer that is directly connected to my computer at my house. Not the one that's in NYC that I have no issues printing to. So while they try to fix the problem I'm free to ramble.
- It is stinking gorgeous in Atlanta today. The sky is a clear blue, the temperature is perfect...and IT just fixed my printer..Damn they're fast.