Tuesday, December 6, 2005

Billboard Music Awards- Toya
We are taping the Billboard awards as Tia is at class and I am SUPPOSED to be practicing on my turntables but it is rumored that Kevin Federline, K-Fed if you will, is to perform tonight. I cannot seem to tear myself away from the TV. Therefore I will type my commentary as it comes to mind. I may post this, I may not. Either way, I need to be doing something constructive and I haven't posted in a bit.

1. Green Day- I have not felt one thing that Green Day has put out since "Brain Stew". I was at a booking agency one day and there was a copy of Spin magazine on the receptionist desk. Someone had written SELLOUT all over Billy Jo's face. Ouch! I don't want to be one of those people that say that because a punk group becomes popular that they have sold out. I mean if anything, well...they have been a nice break from Blink-182.

2. Ciara- Okay, the only thing missing from Ciara's performance was a hoop earring with a key in it. Good grief, Holy Rhythm Nation Batman! From the jet black hair, to the one handed countdown from five, to the "I like that" in between songs, I mean dag! I don't understand how Ciara is a singer and only adlibs to her song as it plays. I am not a Ciara hater. However, I am a hater of the low industry standards that has allowed this to be acceptable. And where is Fantasia? I hope someone comes out and actually sings soon.

3. Nick Cannon just came out in Hulk Hogan's old wrestling pants.

4. Mariah Carey just won the Best Female R&B and Hip Hop award. I love Mariah, I don't care what she wears. Her album is FIRE and the more I hear it, the more I love it. And because she appears to be the only one on here that can sing, I will not talk about how she looks like she was wrapped in some tight silver Christmas ribbon.

5. Toby Keith is on and I am reminded how I have lived in Nashville for 5 years and have not run into not one country singer. I don't mean at shows cause after all Damien did introduce me to Big Kenny of Big and Rich. I mean at like Kroeger or Puckett's Country Store or even Starbucks? Doesn't Chris Cagle live in Nashville? Why haven't I run into him? Probably because God knows better.

Speaking of Chris Cagle, this was on his website recently...

To All My Loyal Music Fans: "As many of you are aware, I had been anxiously awaiting the addition of a new baby to my life. The baby has been born and both mother and child are in good health. Since the birth, however, we have discovered that biologically, the child is not mine. As excited as I was about becoming a new father, my disappointment is equally as strong. So out of respect for all that are involved, please allow this situation to remain private and know that I will not be commenting further on this very personal matter. I'm thanking you in advance for your kind cooperation and understanding." Chris Cagle

Umm...damn.

5. Pretty Ricky is on. Tia and I have one question and it is not why their group is called Pretty Ricky when none of them is named Ricky. OUR question is why is their group called Pretty Ricky when NAMN (not a damn) one of them is remotely pretty?

6. You know what? I actually like Ashlee Simpson's songs. They feed my inner Chrissy. I can't help it. Uh oh, Ashlee Simpson and Pretty Ricky are doing a "collab". Tim, you know I am pissed to the highest pont of pisstivity over that.

7. I am VERY happy that Mario won with "Let Me Love You". The song is sweet, positive and is actually a song that he can get onstage and thank God for.

8. This DJ is making feel like a big DJing poser. I SWEAR I am practicing when this goes off. He is so freaking good.

9. LL Cool J is making me stumble. He looks so good, I am having an allergic reaction. I am SO fasting tomorrow.

10. Gwen Stefani's "Luxurious"- If one more person samples The Isley Brothers "Between the Sheets", Ron Isley needs to go Mr. Biggs on them and beat the snot out of them with his cane. Before I fall asleep on this performance, allow me to get on my soapbox and talk about something that has been bothering me for a long time...

Billboard has murdered R&B by combining the genres of R&B and Hip Hop on their charts and that is why the state of pure R&B is so horrible. Radio has gotten sucked in. This is why we are lacking "Grown Folks" music. What happened to just singing? I don't want to hear a Teena Marie song with the Cash Money Click rhymin in the bridge. It sucks for real.

11. Tom Petty is getting the Century award and I am not mad. My favorite Tom Petty song? His duet with Stevie Nicks "Stop Draggin My Heart Around". You know, the more songs they play of his, the more I realize that I like a GRIP of his songs. How'd I forget "Refugee"? Tom got hits! I need to go on and get that greatest hits record. Tom Petty to me has always been somewhat of a Bob Dylan that I could actually understand. Damn, damn , DAMN Tom Petty is OLD! What is going on? Where did the time go?

12. I aint lyin', Scott Weiland is gonna cause me to go to jail, he is so fine.

13. Thank God for Charlie Wilson. I am so proud of him.

14. Dammit, R-uh's on. R. Kelly is performing "Slow Wind" and the awards show has just taken a sort of BET Uncut turn for the worse.

15. I will say that I do like the fact that if there is an artist that wins a number of awards such as Green Day, they only have to go up once. I appreciate that.

16. First "Dancing with the Stars" and now they are advertising "Skating with Celebrities". Come King Jesus. Please tarry no longer.

17. This year's American Idol winner Carrie Underwood won 3 Billboard awards and I didn't even know her first single came out. Go ahead girl! Country has grown on me. First I started eating sushi this year and now this.

18. Why is Kelly Rowland now the spokesperson for Destiny's Child? She also went to the American Music Awards by herself and accepted their award. My guess is that Beyonce' is too busy being Beyonce' and Michelle is probably happy to finally be out of underneath the pressure of being a "child" and is sitting in front of big old plate of good ol' southern comfort food. I would be, shoot.

19. Kanye West makes me laugh. I don't take him as seriously as most people.

20. Look at Duff McKagan looking good! He must be off the drugs.

21. BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No K-Fed. Wrong, just wrong. See where rumors get you. I am mad because the announcer said that this was the performance that everyone was blogging about. I feel so bamboozled. So led a stray, run amok if you will.

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