Friday, December 5, 2003

Pre-30- Toya

I often feel that being 29 is just getting you ready to be 30. Meaning, those last 23 pounds I have been trying to lose throughout my 20's, I better lose before next December. I need to have money saved and looking at stock options. My struggles that I have had during my 20's need to be wrapped up because the 30's present a whole new set of challenges. I don't want anything to carry over. 30 is serious. No one looks at you like you are a kid when you are 30 unless you look like one, like I do and that is another thing. Like, I had my hair in afro puffs one day and someone asked if I was in high school. I told them I was 28 and they loooked sympathetic. It was like "Are you in denial? Do you even KNOW that you are 28?"

Facing 30 is less painful than when I was facing 20. I don't have nearly as much anxiety after going over my first "decade hump". Who knows? This may actually be fun. I mean, I am a lady now. Children call me Miss Toya. I hated that at first but I like it now.

I once heard Whitney Houston say that in your 20's, you think you know everything and in your 30's you realize that you didn't know jack and are open to learning a lot. Then when you are 40, it is smooth sailing. You're a woman and you know who you are. I am looking forward to that.

I have always said that if I wasn't married by the time I was 30 all bets are off and I was going on a nationwide tour of all colleges, universities, culinary arts and trade schools to recruite. I mean really, if Cameron Diaz and Demi Moore can get some young Tenderonis, why can't I? Shoooooooot, don't be surprised if you see me at Moorehouse.

Fine, young male Tenderoni undergrad: Umm, is this the line for Spring Semester registration?
Tia, recruitment administrator: No, young man. Toya is in town, recruiting. We are going to need you to look directly into this camera phone and then we will need you to fill out this 8 page application. Don't worry, there is no app fee. We are conducting interviews on the quarter hour. Here's a pen and have a seat.

I know, I'm sick. But we had a conversation last night about how we don't know enough men. We know plenty of guys but they are like our little brothers. The ones that aren't are married. So many women, particularly Christian women, overspiritualize things. They think that their husband is just going to fall out of the sky. Well if you have your head in the sand, you aren't going to even see anyone. So we have concluded that next year, we are going to be two social butterflies. We need to get to know more people and I am not ashamed to say, particularly men. I am sure there will be many more tales of this new venture to come.

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